"[to Kenny] Since we are the two oldest kids, one of us needs to earn money. We will settle it this way. [takes a box of frozen pizza and prepares to toss it in the air] Mama Celeste face up, I go to work. Mama Celeste face down, you are selling carnations by the freeway off-ramp."

"Relax Mom, everything's going to be great when you're gone."

"Chevy Chase - Clark Griswold"

"Jane Krakowski - Cousin Vicki"

"Christie Brinkley - The Girl in the Red Ferrari"

"John Candy - Russ Lasky, Guard at Walley World"

"Frank McRae - Grover"

"Eugene Levy - Car Salesman"

"James Keach - Motorcycle Cop"

"Miriam Flynn - Cousin Catherine"

"Brian Doyle-Murray - Kamp Komfort Clerk"

"Eddie Bracken - Roy Walley"

"Dana Barron - Audrey Griswold"

"Every summer, Chevy Chase takes his family on a little trip. This year, he went too far."

"Anthony Michael Hall - Russell "Rusty" Griswold"

"Randy Quaid - Cousin Eddie"

"Imogene Coca - Aunt Edna"

"Beverly D'Angelo - Ellen Griswold"

"My face and your ass... I mean, your ass and my face."

"Blake Clark - Farmer Fran"

"Brian Thompson - Buffalo Bob"

"Fred Ward - Mr. Nunamaker"

"Caroline Aaron - Mrs. Nunamaker"

"Megan Harvey - Joe's little sister"

"Joe Don Baker - Don, Brandy's father"

"Rosanna Arquette - Charlene"

"Kid Rock - Robby"

"Jaime Pressly - Jill"

"Christopher Walken - Anthony Benedetti/Clem Doore/Gert B. Frobe"

"Adam Beach - Kickin' Wing"

"Dennis Miller - Zander Kelly"

"Brittany Daniel - Brandy"

"David Spade - Joseph "Joe" Dirt (né Nunamaker)"

"Clem: [talking to fire extinguisher] You're talkin' to me all wrong... It's the wrong tone. You do it again and I'll stab you in the face with a soldering iron. Hey, tell me, does your mother sew? BOOM. Get her to sew that!"