Comedy Films

"Hey, guys! Motion 78!"

"[talking to Rob about the broken car] My old man lent me this turd."

"Um... you're fat."

"Shift, shift."

"Higgins, don't say that."

"I bet you $5.00 he gets on one knee."

"You see that? You just aim for a spot and shoot the ball there?"

"Lance Armstrong - himself"

"Where is Saskatchatoon?"

"Roxanne, I have made out with about 25 girls in this very spot and I want you to be number 26."

"We needed to be here. Our kids were turning into snotty, spoiled, little. This is what we needed."

"Amanda Detmer - Annie"

"Ralph Ting - Toshi"

"Seth Rogen - Neil"

"Todd Stashwick - Tony"

"Kate Hudson - Molly Thompson-Peterson"

"Bill Hader - Mark"

"If I don't make it to the funeral, tell the police it was Arlene from Applebee's."

"Michael Douglas - Bob Thompson"

"Fish what I wanted."

"Two's company. Dupree's a crowd."

"Owen Wilson - Randolph "Randy" Dupree"

"[seeing Jasmine being sprayed with air by the car's bonnet] Hoochie Mama."

"Matt Dillon - Carl Peterson"

"Hey. What's up, Lenny? Buddy, I thought you were going to start working out."

"Eve Brent – Aunt Thelma"

"Rick Ducommun – Sparks"

"Mimi Maynard – Betty Smith"

"Steve Levitt – Gil"

"Jan Rubes – Illyich"

"Brian Doyle-Murray – Mr. Jones"

"Tony Edwards – Nathan"

"Charles Martin Smith – Mr. Smith"

"Ayre Gross – Wendell"

"Kelly Preston – Bonnie"

"John Travolta – Travis"

"Deborah Foreman – Jill"

"Marisol Nichols as Young audition actress"

"James Keach – Yuri"

"Jack Ammon – Doc Benson"

"[about the citizens of Indian Springs] Where are we going to put them? They can't stay at my place."

"Terence Stamp as Terry Stricter"

"Robert Downey, Jr. as Jerry Renfro"

"Christine Baranski as Carol"

"Jamie Kennedy as Dave"

"Steve Martin as Robert "Bobby" Bowfinger"

"Eddie Murphy as Kit Ramsey / Jefferson "Jiff" Ramsey"

"John Cho as Nightclub cleaner"

"Heather Graham as Daisy"

"Edward Sinclair as Park attendant (uncredited)"