"I don't care what undercover rock you crawled out from, there's a dress code for detectives in Robbery-Homicide. Section 3-605. 10. 20. 22. 24. 26. 50. 70. 80. It specifies: clean shirt, short hair, tie, pressed trousers, sports jacket or suit, and leather shoes, preferably with a high shine on them."

"Tom Hanks as Det. Pep Streebek"

"Dan Aykroyd as Sgt. Joe Friday"

"Your attention, please. The story you are about to see is true; the names have been changed to protect the innocent. For example: George Baker is now called "Sylvia Wiss.""

"Stephanie Oliver as Joan Beardsley, Frank's daughter"

"Ben Murphy as Larry, Colleen's boyfriend"

"Harry Holcombe as Judge"

"Marti Litis as Hospital Nurse"

"Mary Gregory as Sister Mary Alice"

"Nancy Howard as Nancy Beardsley, Howard's wife (Frank's sister-in-law)"

"Walter Brooke as Howard Beardsley, Frank's brother"

"Tom Bosley as Family Doctor"

"Sidney Miller as Dr. Ashford"

"Louise Troy as Madeleine Love"

"Van Johnson as Warrant Officer Darrell Harrison"

"Tracy Nelson as Germaine Beardsley, Frank's daughter"

"Michele Tobin as Veronica Beardsley, Frank's daughter"

"Holly O'Brien as Susan Beardsley, Frank's daughter"

"Maralee Foster as Mary Beardsley, Frank's daughter"

"Suzanne Cupito as Louise Beardsley, Frank's daughter"

"Nancy Roth as Rosemary Beardsley, Frank's daughter"

"Gary Goetzman as Greg Beardsley, Frank's adoptive son"

"Gil Rogers as Rusty Beardsley, Frank's son"

"Tim Matthieson as Mike Beardsley, Frank's son"

"Henry Fonda as Frank Beardsley (the father of 10 Kids) from Mine later Joe's father from Ours"

"Lynnell Atkins as Teresa North, Helen's daughter"

"Greg Atkins as Gerald North, Helen's son"

"Eric Shea as Phillip North, Helen's son"

"Margot Jane as Jean North, Helen's daughter"

"Mitch Vogel as Tommy North, Helen's son"

"Kevin Burchett as Nicky North, Helen's son"

"Kimberly Beck as Janette North, Helen's daughter"

"Jennifer Leak as Colleen North, Helen's daughter"

"Lucille Ball as Helen North (the mother of 8 Kids) from Yours later Joe's mother from Ours"

"The Bride Had 8 Boys and Girls. The Groom Had 10 Boys and Girls. Their wedding night set new attendance records."

"He had a population of 10...She had a community of 8...When you have 18 kids - nothing's impossible...except having nineteen!"

"A Honeymoon is No Place to Have Kids!"

"[narrating] It was a typical wedding: enemies of the bride on the right, enemies of the groom on the left."

"Charles Rule as Joseph Hewes (NC)"

"Rex Robbins as Roger Sherman (CT)"

"John Myhers as Robert Livingston (NY)"

"James Noble as Reverend John Witherspoon (NJ)"

"Jonathan Moore as Lyman Hall (GA)"