"Listening in response to criticism mandates a shift in our internal psyche that marks perhaps the most important single evolutionary shift humans can make."

"During what years should a child be introduced to better ways of giving and receiving criticisms – to what I call “relationship language”? Before school age. The best teacher? Parents."

"Schools currently excel in encouraging children to express opinions, but are deficient in encouraging children to say, for example, “Oh, that’s different from my perspective – tell me more.”"

"When we give trust, we receive trust. And people who trust us pay attention to us."

"Listening is self-empowerment via the empowerment of others."

"In the past, socializing men to become the best killer-protectors led to the survival of the “fittest.” In the future, with nuclear technology, training killers is more likely to lead to the destruction of everyone."

"Teaching children to debate without teaching children to listen is divorce training."

"Tone of voice is more crucial than words."

"If our binoculars search for our partner’s best intent, it will usually be found."

"We are the offspring of approval-seekers. We want approval so badly that we vacillate between conforming to get it and standing out (being outstanding) to get it."

"What’s true is that everyone is uncomfortable with expressing anger and being critical. Anger and criticism generates rejection. And everyone hates rejection."

"When a woman appears to express fear, we cannot assure her without at least releasing her from responsibility; when we interpret the same emotion in a man as anger, we want to blame him and be certain he acknowledges responsibility. We want to find her guiltless; we want to find him guilty."

"Any guy who’s played team sports has practiced a skill I call “team sport empathy”: he’s practiced focusing on anticipating the other team’s moves. That means figuring out their way of looking at the situation."

"Our choice of partners is perhaps the clearest single statement of our choice of values. Therefore, when we blame our partner for anything, we should really be confronting ourselves. Not as in “Yes, I made a bad choice,” but as in “How does this choice reflect my values?”"

"If we have integrity about our desire to support men to express feelings, every institution and attitude between the sexes will require questioning and adjusting."

"A man fears that conflict with his wife will lead to less intimacy, not more intimacy."

"Empathy for women is an attribute of masculinity. When men play the protector role they are trying to save a woman from grief or pain. If they had no glimpse of her grief or pain, they wouldn’t know when to protect."

"When either sex suppresses the expression of feelings, it’s almost always b/c they don’t feel there is a safe environment to express them."

"Humans have spent (10k+) years learning to fight and debate with the other side, and almost no time learning to listen and empathize."

"Sometimes I have a feeling, when I look back on my life, that all I’ve been through has prepared me perfectly for just what I’m doing now."

"To me, God is the accumulated wisdom I've gathered throughout my life. When I pay attention, my body gives me a printout of this wisdom."

"If my parents had made love a tenth of a second earlier or later, I wouldn’t exist. What an enormous miracle, just being given life."

"This is the first time in history that we’ve had this level of luxury, so we have a new opportunity to rethink the way we approach God."

"By attending to the conscious part of ourselves, we contribute to the peace of others as well as ourselves."

"In more than thirty years of conducting workshops, no one has ever said to me, “Warren, I want a divorce – my partner understands me.”"

"Nothing threatens a father’s involvement in the family more than his obligation to be the family’s “financial womb,” creating “The Father’s ‘Catch-22’”: loving the family by being away from the family. It is the irony of traditional fatherhood: being a father by not being a father."

"A man becomes successful by repressing his feelings, not expressing his feelings."

"It never occurs to most of us at a moment of disagreement with our partner to take the time to appreciate our partner’s positive character strengths as reflected in a stance we disagree with. When we do that, it allows our partner to know that no matter which decision she or he makes, our trust in their underlying character is never in question. It turns every disagreement into a potential gift of love."

"When I lose my larger sense of supporting people to be their best, I lessen my contact with the God inside me."

"In the future, women will increasingly want men who can nurture them and connect with them."

"Framework, (...)"

"addiction to female beauty and sex;"

"With men, we blame the victim. We blame men because we have camouflaged men’s victimization by teaching men to also be the victimizer. Men’s victimizer status camouflages men’s victim status."

"By giving women training to sue a company for a ‘hostile environment’ if someone tells a dirty joke, we are training women to run to the Government as Substitute Husband (or Father). This gets companies to fear women, but not to respect women. The best preparation we can give women to succeed in the workplace is the preparation to overcome barriers rather than to sue: successful people don’t sue, they succeed."

"Ideally there should not be a men’s movement but a gender transition movement; only the power of the women’s movement necessitates the temporary corrective of a men’s movement. And this creates a special challenge for men: There are few political movements filled with healthy people, yet few healthy changes have occurred without political movements."

"deprivation of the beautiful woman and sex with her until the man guarantees economic security in return; (...)"

"We have restricted humans from giving ‘free’ food to bears and dolphins because we know that such feeding would make them dependent and lead to their extinction. But when it comes to our own species, we have difficulty seeing the connection between short-term kindness and long-term cruelty; we give women money to have more children, making them more dependent with each child and discouraging them from developing the tools to fend for themselves. The real discrimination against women, then, is ‘free feeding’."

"Many black men leave because they are financially responsible--not because they are emotionally irresponsible."

"Employers are NOT prohibited from practicing sex discrimination in hiring and promoting employees."

"[H]umans tend to start the process of change by acknowledging themselves—thus blacks asserted black pride and black is beautiful; women declared I am woman, I am strong ; men are saying I am man, I am okay. After a quarter of a century of male bashing, that’s not a bad start."

"The Government as Substitute Husband did for women what labor unions still have not accomplished for men. And men pay dues for labor unions; the taxpayer pays the dues for feminism. Feminism and government soon become taxpayer-supported women’s unions."

"When a government subsidy deprives the child of its dad the government is really subsidizing child abuse."

"We do not yet understand that when we neglect men, we rape women."

"The Ms. survey can call it a rape; a relationship counselor will call it a relationship."

"Most rapes of men occur in prison. But even outside of prison, about 9 percent of reported rapes are against men (probably mostly by men, but no one knows for sure). Even rape outside of prison, then, is about as significant an issue for men as AIDS is for women—about 10 percent of the people dying of AIDS are women. Do we hear more about men being raped or about women getting AIDS?"