Grandma's Boy

"What is that ringing? Do I have a tumor?"

"Drive, monkey, DRIVE!!"

"I'm way too baked to drive to the Devil's house!"

"This shit's fuckin' crazy!"

"Dude, that party was off the hook, kid. Your girl can drink her fuckin' face off!"

"I got my yellow belt, monkey got his red belt...he's a quick learner!"

"Shut up, monkey, I've got company, dude!"

"You look like a bag of shit. You sure you don't wanna borrow my birthday suit?"

"I feel like Tom Cruise in Cocktail!"

"It's tequila! It's supposed to fuck you up!"

"Stupid fucking idiot. Red-shirted ass."

"Yes, it sucks we don't have alcohol, but we do serve shots...of wheat grass."

"I know the food doesn't sound good, but it tastes good, and is good for you."

"You said it wrong, stupid. It's Shiloh."

"You were sweet."

"Welcome to Our Lady Health. My name's Shiloh, and I'll be serving you today."

"Let's make fun of the vegans and their crazy lifestyle. We're not hurting anybody. Go eat a hamburger and choke on a cow dick!"

"Jeff: [to Grace] So I mean, what's it like being old? It's gotta be weird, right? I mean, you saw a lotta stuff go down. World War I, World War II, the automobile, Tupac, I mean..."

"Grace: I once gave Charlie Chaplin a handjob."

"Jeff: No way! Was he silent?"

"Grace: Not after I got through with him."

"Jeff: So Barry sucked on his first boobie last night."

"[people clap]"

"Barry: [proudly] For 13 hours."

"A movie that proves you're never too old to come of age."

"CAUTION: This film contains images and themes such as primates sipping herb, scantily clad women, scantily clad geriatrics, metal legs, sweet car beds, and a lot of dorks playing videogames. If any of these things "spark" your interest, we should definitely hang out this weekend. Enjoy the movie."

"Sex. Drugs. Nakedness. Rude language... And proud of it!"

"Gamers, grannies and stoners unite!"

"Linda Cardellini - Samantha"

"Allen Covert - Alex"

"Peter Dante - Dante"

"Shirley Jones - Grace"

"Shirley Knight - Bea"

"Joel Moore - J.P."

"Kevin Nealon - Mr. Cheezle"

"Doris Roberts - Grandma Lilly"

"Nick Swardson - Jeff"

"Jonah Hill - Barry"

"Kelvin Yu - Kane"

"Rob Schneider - Yuri"

"David Spade - Shiloh"