Down to Earth (2001 film)

"I had a hard enough time trying to get this girl as a rich white man. Do you know how hard it's going to be to try to get her as a broke black man?"

"My father's so cheap... that when we went to bed, he'd unplug the alarm clocks. "You can't tell time when you are asleep.""

"[after learning that he wasn't supposed to die] You killed me! You killed me! You killed me!"

"Tiger Woods, Y'all, Tiger Woods, Y'all! Tiger, Tiger, Tiger, Tiger, Tiger Woods, Y'all!"

"Shut up before I crush you with my wallet!"

"From now on, we need to make a new slogan. If you get shot in the head, you get a bed. If you head is bloody, we're your buddy."

"Didn't your momma ever tell you to carry an extra handcuff key?"

"We're going in there. If you can walk, let's walk. If you can't walk, it's time to roll. If you have crutches, then crutch your ass in there!"

"A story of premature reincarnation."

"Chris Rock - Lance Barton"

"Regina King - Sontee Jenkins"

"Mark Addy - Cisco"

"Eugene Levy - Keyes"

"Frankie Faison as Whitney Daniels"

"Greg Germann - Sklar"

"Jennifer Coolidge - Mrs. Wellington"

"Chazz Palminteri - King"

"Wanda Sykes - Wanda"

"John Cho - Phil Quon"

"Mario Joyner - Apollo M.C."

"Charles Matthew Blake - Charles Wellington III"