"Why do wives have to spend so much time dusting, vacuuming, mopping, making beds, washing dishes, when you just have to do it all again six months later?"

"Looking fifty is great—if you're sixty."

"I'm Jewish. I don't work out. If God had wanted us to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor."

"A man can sleep around, no questions asked, but if a woman makes nineteen or twenty mistakes she's a tramp."

"My obstetrician was so dumb that when I gave birth he forgot to cut the cord. For a year that kid followed me everywhere. It was like having a dog on a leash."

"I succeeded by saying what everyone else is thinking."

"I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw that my bath toys were a toaster and a radio."

"Change cannot come from one politician, it has to come from each one of us and not just for today...it's a gradual process. Let's be responsible & work towards it."

"We know only too well that all over the world, from wayward undergraduate to B. B. C. producer to publisher's reader there are people, otherwise sensible and sane, people who would not believe in six-headed cats and blood-curdling spectral monsters, who yet read some folly about Noah's ark or Atlantis or cataclysmic world-tides, and say, with a contented sigh, "There may be something in it, you know.""

"Ramadan typically brings a spike in violence in Middle East. I get grumpy when I don't eat - but I don't blow things up. Religion of peace?"

"I'm not sorry for stealing my husband from his wife."

"Would I employ you if you were obese? No I would not. You would give the wrong impression to the clients of my business. I need people to look energetic, professional and efficient. If you are obese you look lazy."

"The difference between most mothers and me is that I didn't sit around drinking coffee at baby group for 12 months after the birth of my baby. No, in three weeks I was back in my suit, back at my desk earning profit for my business and I don’t see why other women shouldn't do the same."

"Women don’t want equal treatment, they couldn’t handle it if they got it. It’s a tough world out there. What a lot of women are actually looking for is special treatment. What women need to realise is that they have to toughen up."

"It makes a lot of sense to me. She seems to me like a Jewish woman, the way she thinks and behaves."

"She was the wildest, funniest, cleverest, wittiest and the most bonkers of all of us."

"In my view there can be no affirmative action without segregation-nor any end to the segregation if our names must be kept on separate lists. I'd like to propose instead a simple scenario: a fair job market where employment is commensurate with ability regardless of gender, racial or ethnic background. I make a pitch, they like my story, I get the job. Why not ?"

"Aimee Teegarden: Recent polls have shown a fifth of Americans can't locate the U. S. on a world map. Why do you think this is? Caitlin Upton: I personally believe that U. S. Americans are unable to do so because, uh, some people out there in our nation don't have maps and, uh, I believe that our education, like such as in South Africa and, uh, the Iraq, everywhere like such as, and I believe that they should—our education over here in the U. S. should help the U. S., uh, or, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq, and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future, for our children."

"Caitlin Upton: I competed in Miss Teen USA in 2007 and I made a horrible mistake on stage."

"By the way, for the kids at home, Santa just is white, but this person is arguing that maybe we should also have a black Santa. Santa is what he is, and just so you know, we're just debating this because someone wrote about it, kids."

"Just because it makes you feel uncomfortable doesn't mean it has to change. You know, I mean, Jesus was a white man too, but, you know, it's like — We have — He was a historical figure, that's a verifiable fact, as is Santa. I just want the kids at home to know that."

"Hold on. I realize — can, just, just — I realize something's happening in Ferguson, but we're talking about something important here, so can you at least split-screen the video? I realize — look, the protesters and the police are clashing again, alright? They’re clashing again. But we're talking about the dead— the death of an American— of an American who was beheaded, and Pete deserves his say."

"Is this just math that you do as a Republican to make yourself feel better. or is this real?"

"Who are you actually talking to? Children who are sophisticated enough to be watching a news channel at 10 o'clock at night, yet innocent enough to still believe Santa Claus is real, yet racist enough to be freaked out if he isn't white?"

"The-the-the criticism people have of your position, Reverend, is— you want God out of everything!"

"Barack Obama tends to poll better than he performs. The bottom line is, don't trust the polls. With all due respect to our pollsters, they might not tell us anything."

"Why can't it be a day where we take a moment and we stop and acknowledge the role that God has played in the formation of this country and its laws? What's so promotional about religion there?"

"...in Palau I seemed to be the perfect princess, this time I was competitive and sometimes the bad guy. I played competitively both times. I think there is a happy medium to me. I'm not perfect or horrible. I've always had to work hard for everything I've gotten in life. I went in to bust my butt and I hope people can respect me for that. I played the game the way it was designed to be played..."

"Coming into the game, I didn't think I would get far. But when I did, there were only two people who were blindsided on the jury. After Jamie and Judd were in the jury, it became obvious that I was the right person to take to the end – back at Jury camp, one bad seed spoils the bunch. That was when it became obvious I couldn't win."

"Competition is good."

"Abortion should never be used as a method of birth control, but the consequences of making it a black market procedure are too high. My stance is that it should be Safe, Legal, Rare and Privately Funded."

"A parent knows an individual child's needs better than a set of guidelines will. A group of parents and teachers in a community will almost always know what's best for that community's students, than that of state board of education."

"We have also watched the Federal Government grow in power and scope. Our nation was designed to foster 50 hotbeds of innovation and experimentation. Sadly, the Federal Government attempts to micromanage everything from Washington D.C. For example, the Federal Departments of Agriculture and Transportation are currently attempting to require anyone operating farm equipment on their own property to have a Commercial Driver's License (CDL). This places an undue burden on family farms. For the first 220 years of the Federal Government's existence, our farming communities have managed to operate farm equipment without the government's interference. Laws that hurt Hoosier jobs must be nullified."

"While technology has helped us be more efficient when elections are run, those same elections should be secure and auditable. Many county clerks would like to put printable receipts on their electronic voting machines, but they do not have the funding. These print-outs would provide the voter and the county a paper trail in case of close recounts. This will help eliminate voter fraud."

"Every election we hear about the trouble with our public education systems. Despite all of the attention and lip service this critically important issue receives, we continue to see vast opportunity for improvement. I have personally seen the devastating effects of failing schools. They impact our children in profound ways."

"I've been married to my wife for fourteen wonderful years. But like many couples out there, we've had our hardships, we've had our trials, but nothing like the LGBT community has to go through. It pains me to see my family and friends blocked from the same rights, privileges, protections that my wife and I are granted just because we are legally married. What does it say to the youth of Indiana when a whole segment of our society is treated like second-class citizens? What does it say about the future of Indiana? When we promote bullying and discrimination in our laws, how can we stop it in our classrooms? As many of you out there know, I am working hard to become Indiana's next governor, and as governor, I promise to fight and block HJR6, to fight to repeal Indiana DOMA. I will fight for the LGBT community, I will fight for all Hoosiers. It's time to stop the hate, it's time to stand for equality. It's time, Indiana. It's our time. Thank you."

"Unfortunately, we have a system today that allows politicians to buy things for other people using money that doesn't come out of their own pocket."

"State Government needs to understand that they work for the people and that the people do not work to support government."

"Politicians often talk about “creating jobs” as though they can magically invent them from thin air. A “government job” or a job subsidized by government funds requires the salary for that position to be drained out of the private sector through taxes. Moving wealth from one place to another is not actually 'creating' anything."

"The right to be secure in your home so long as you are doing no harm to others is a founding principle of this country and that includes being secure from unwarranted invasion, search or seizure by government agents or bureaucrats."

"I'm that guy who just trusts a little too much."

"We are going to take the libertarian philosophy to the people."

"The game is giant, but my marriage is even bigger. I love my wife, and you will hear me say to others, “We might have to get rid of Laura, maybe,” but there is no way I would ever write my wife's name down--I don't see it. I already told Laura, “If you have to, because I know I'm gonna be a lot bigger target than you,” if Laura has to write my name down, it's more than fine, it's more than fine."

"You don't have to be a horse's butt to win this game; you can't be an angel, but you sure don't have to be an ass."

"In history, the arrival of a small man in a big hat is rarely good news."

"I'd very rarely quote George Galloway as an authority, but when he describes Rochdale as "tinder dry, waiting for a spark" I am afraid – very much afraid – he isn't wrong."

"As the night wore on, it became clearer this was not just a simple Tories-out, Labour-in story. The more we look in detail, the more this seems like the night of the great insurgency – a multi-sided protest and revolt against politics as usual. The British public was sending the political class, Labour included, a message which could be summed up as: we, not you, are the masters now, and for a very long time to come."

"Business never rests."

"A lot of bloggers seem to be socially inadequate, pimpled, single, slightly seedy, bald, cauliflower-nosed young men sitting in their mother's basements and ranting. They are very angry people."