Television Personalities

"Hey, son, what the hell is with your haircut? Did you see a paintbrush and say "I want that dude's look!"?"

"The final lesson I learned at the show -- and I learned it not at the show, but because of the show and the news I was covering is -- please don't forget that the world is a friendlier place than the internet and the news will make you think?"

"For any comedian, your life informs your point of view, the way you see the world. My comedy comes through the prism of race or class, because those are two worlds that collided for me growing up. And I guess that’s served me well, because those themes cross over countries and continents. We’re all still dealing with those issues today."

"I think the most important thing is to instantly give them a sense of who you are and how you feel in that moment. If a speaker is nervous and tells the audience that, people immediately contextualize it and respond accordingly. If a performer is in a good mood or feeling wild and crazy and says so, I’ve found, the crowd will be good at matching that energy. So for me, the rapport is built by a genuineness conveyed as quickly as possible."

"I felt like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, it was, like, the weirdest thing ever. I just came for a tour, I just wanted some of the Wonka bars and then the next thing, I'm, like, managing the Oompa Loompas. I'm like "Aaah! I don't know how this works, this is crazy!""

"La gente mangia carne e pensa: "Diventerò forte come un bue". Dimenticando che il bue mangia erba. Mangiarsi con gusto un animale è assassinio premeditato a scopo di libidine. Digerirlo, occultamento di cadavere."

"If the NFL is going to make us pick between the NFL and a love of country, those of us who love football are going to pick our country over that game, To think that we have men who take to the field and take a knee when we play the national anthem I think is disappointing. Frankly, I think it's disgusting, When you kneel in front of the flag, it's disrespect to the men and women who served — those who have made the ultimate sacrifice, you could have an issue with America, but you don't kneel in front of the flag that represents so many great things"

"So weird, how our prejudices have given everyone their lane. Middle Easterner does something, they're a terrorist. Black person does something, they're gang-related, they're a thug. But if a white guy walks into a church killing nine people there, what do they lead with on the news? "And today, in an isolated incident, a lone gunman walked into a church opening fire and killing nine people." It's always a lone gunman. "A lone gunman with no ties to society whatsoever". They always separate them as quickly as possible."

"We drink to enjoy. The Scottish drink to die."

"For me, Donald Trump is an emotional paradox, I'm not gonna lie. Logically, I can process him, emotionally, I struggle. On the one hand, I will admit, I wake up many days terrified at the notion that he's president of the most powerful nation in the world. But I also must admit, I wake up many days knowing he's gonna make me laugh. There's terror and there's joy and I don't know how to feel. You know what it feels like sometimes? It feels like there's a giant asteroid headed towards the earth, but it's shaped like a penis. Like, I think I'm gonna die, but I know I'm gonna laugh."

"You don't go to South Africa to escape racism. That's where you go to stock up. Are you kidding me, that's the one thing that reminds me of home. The racism out here."

"I spend most of my day screaming — and then over time I get tired and then when I'm tired, I start thinking of the jokes. … That's what I always loved about comedy, it is a way for us to just, you know, to numb the pain, to process what we're going through without feeling every single inkling of it."

"He's always been the person who's made me laugh most. He uses humour in a very disarming way. I've seen how people enjoy his company and have always envied that, and have wanted to aspire to that."

"I was embarrassed by it and racked by middle-class guilt. But when you're on stage, if you're trying to be something you're not, it becomes so much harder. It's better to be honest and take every vulnerability and flaw you have, and mock them and deal with them."

"Whitehall, on being "posh", or coming from an affluent background"

"Last year, the President promised he would use his pen and phone to ignore the legislative branch and push through his agenda by executive fiat. We have witnessed one executive power grab after another, setting a dangerous precedent and eroding the constitutional balance set forward by our Founders. As the President himself once said, elections have consequences. The most recent one being he must work with the Republican-controlled Congress, rather than spout recycled, failed ideas from past speeches. Americans are looking for leadership. They want solutions."

"Insulting people does not work if your objective is to persuade them. When a person is insulted, they become even more dogmatic in holding their incorrect belief. If you are going to say that the Lord called you to go into politics, then you need to act like it. If you are not going to act like it, then you need to take His name out of the equation."

"I come from the stage so being involved with such a gigantic film was just a new thing for me which I really loved. And for sure I would love to do something like this again. There's lots of things that have opened up for me. I'll just make sure I'll make the wisest decisions because this is a very delicate moment. And someday I will go back to the stage because that's where I feel at home."

"It's because it's very European. And I'm Italian and it's very close to my culture and all the steppings for where all these legends took place, some places I'm very familiar with. And on the other hand, there's also something that's really special about Dracula & Array; which is the constant search for blood, which is enticing and sensual. And which is why The Count has three Brides."

"You can only cook Italian if you are Italian or you think like an Italian and then you don't need the recipe. To think like an Italian in the kitchen means to be frugal. It's a very simple concept. Buy in season, keep it simple and don't buy anything you are going to leave wilting in the fridge."

"I seem to be the most wordy when it comes to monsters because I'm a bit of a monster freak. I grew up just loving all the Draculas. Especially I just loved watching all the Universal classics. And Bela has been my favorite ever since. I would say though that I have a new favorite Dracula here. I've always loved those movies. And it was such an honor to be cast with this role."

"Has anyone ever known a school to organize a field trip to a slaughterhouse? Never. Why? Where does this sense of shame come from that obliges us to keep silent in front of our children about the fate that we impose on animals? Throat-cutting, electrocution, and evisceration—are these scenes that would be obscene in the eyes of innocents? The answer is yes."

"Dana is a fearless conservative who is not afraid to confront the liberal media bias head on,” the Texas senator and Republican presidential candidate said in the same statement. “She is a passionate fighter for liberty and an important voice for conservatives. I am thrilled to have Dana on our team and work together to win the White House in 2016."

"As one of the original founders of the modern-day Tea Party movement, I watched grassroots conservatives support Ted Cruz’s David and Goliath success against Dewhurst and the Republican establishment. Cruz has fought to repeal Obamacare, shrink the size of government; he has defended our gun rights, our right to privacy, our sovereignty and borders. I personally feel that Ted Cruz is the best choice to reverse America’s road to ruin and am proud to support him in the 2016 Republican primary."

"I think it’s easier to mourn over a lion that’s been killed than over a baby that’s been killed, I think that’s how far we are from our humanity,"

"They use their media to assassinate real news. They use their schools to teach children that their president is another Hitler. They use their movie stars and singers and comedy shows and award shows to repeat their narrative over and over again. And then they use their ex-president to endorse the resistance. All to make them march, make them protest, make them scream racism and sexism and xenophobia and homophobia. To smash windows, burn cars, shut down interstates and airports, bully and terrorize the law-abiding until the only option left is for the police to do their jobs and stop the madness. And when that happens, they’ll use it as an excuse for their outrage. The only way we stop this, the only we save our country and our freedom, is to fight this violence of lies with the clenched fist of truth. I’m the National Rifle Association of America, and I’m freedom’s safest place."

"[A] lot of conservatives have been calling for Lahrens head since her View appearance, insisting it's an embarrassment and an outrage that such a pro-choice harpy could be a public face of Republicanism. As with Milo Yiannopoulos—who said all sorts of horrible things about women, Muslims, transgender people, etc., but was only ousted from polite conservatism after joking about pedophilic priests—it's telling (if predictable) that tepidly pro-choice views are the dealbreaker for the right with Lahren, while things like calling Black Lives Matter activists "the new KKK," referring to the Middle East as a "sandbox" that needs to be bombed, and defending the shooting of unarmed black men by cops never really rustled Republican jimmies."

"I'm not a big fan of right-wing infotainment personality Tomi Lahren. I think she's a hack. On the other hand, she ought to be defended from accusations of hypocrisy in the wake of Lahrens public confession that she's still on her parents' healthcare plan. … Nor is it at all clear that Lahren would be without insurance in the absence of Obamacare. Indeed, in the absence of Obamacare, premiums for high-deductible insurance for someone like Lahren would likely have been much lower, and Lahren may have easily been able to afford it. In fact, it may be that Lahren would have rather been able to purchase a high-deductible plan rather than be on her parent's plan. Maybe she hates having to go through her parents for coverage. However, since Obamacare has massively increased premium costs for young people not on group plans, getting insurance through her parents may now be Lahrens best option. ¶ Thus, if we consider the unseen side effects of Obamacare regulations in this case, it may be that Lahren is actually a victim of Obamacare."

"We’ve had it with your narratives, your propaganda, your fake news. We’ve had it with your constant protection of your Democrat overlords, your refusal to acknowledge any truth that upsets the fragile construct that you believe is real life. And we’ve had it with your tone-deaf assertion that you are in any way truth or fact-based journalism. Consider this the shot across your proverbial bow. In short? We’re coming for you."

"I grew up watching this mainstream media and seeing a lot of the BS perpetuated by the mainstream media ... and I wanted to combat that. So I started off at an early age, and we're just getting started."

"In order for me to give respect to what they're saying, I have to respect them," Lahren said. "And when they're on the internet trolling me, saying nasty, disgusting, vile things - which by the way is really a true testament to the unloving and intolerant left - I laugh it off"

"I think that in a campaign there are certain things that you are going to hear and certain behaviors that you will see that will be tempered by the -- after the election -- tempered by simply just going into the White House. However, that being said, I don’t think that the, for the lack of a better way to put it, the zero relationship with the mainstream media is going to be one of those things. Look, this media has not only impugned the character of half of the country, they’ve done this since 2008, 2009, they’ve definitely did this in 2010. Particularly when they were going to push the unaffordable health care act and get that passed. And they were trying to say anyone who disagreed with it, well you may have to check your soul and have a talk with Jesus, cause something’s seriously wrong with you. It’s probably because the president’s black. That’s one of the things that we all heard over and over again. They questioned everybody’s character. And so I am actually happy, because I have long been a huge critic of the media. And I hate that what I do is considered part of it. Because I don’t consider myself part of them. However, I am very glad to see -- I said this actually on television not too long ago -- I am happy, just frankly, to see them curb-stomped. I mean, let’s be real about it, Grant. These people are just the worst thing that could ever possibly happen just to the American political system right now with the way that they cover so many things. For instance, when -- nobody gets a fair shake on policy, no one gets a fair shake where it concerns immigration. They conflate illegal and legal immigration. They conflate a number of things, particularly the coverage on gun control. I have so many things that I hate about mainstream media, there is no way we’re going to fit it in the allotted time today. They are the rat bastards of the earth. They are the boil on the backside of American politics. I have no other nice way to put it."

"I'm for limited government, so stay out of my guns, and you can stay out of my body as well."

"Dr. King said he had a dream that WE would get to the promised land.Well, we’re here. We just have to live it. Through hard work and service to our fellow man, we can have it. In America, there is enough to go around."

"God spoke to me and God told me, "Keep your son,” And I did and he saved my life. My son saved my life. Had I not had my son, I would probably be dead right now."

"I just think it’s funny that he has a twin brother and he’s never used me in one of his illusions."

"Ever since we were out of the womb, we've been competing. That's just how brothers are."

"I became quite green - I have a very strong connection to nature. I read that if we fish the way we fish, in 2048 there will be no more fish left, which is pretty soon. So it's a statement."

"If you look at our country's history, change doesn't come from presidents. Change comes from large groups of angry people."

"I believe that animals have rights which, although different from our own, are just as inalienable. I believe animals have the right not to have pain, fear or physical deprivation inflicted upon them by us. Even if they are on the way to the slaughterhouse, animals have the right to food and water and shelter if it is needed. They have the right not to be brutalized in any way as food resources, for entertainment or any other purpose. … Finding a substitute for animals in research has only recently become an imperative in the scientific community. … One day animals will not be used in the laboratory. How soon that day comes depends on how soon people stop screaming and make the search for alternatives a major research imperative. As long as conferences on the subject sound like feeding time in the monkey house, monkeys along with millions of other animals are going to stay right where they are now — in the laboratory."

"My beloved brothers and sisters. On the globe, several incidents have occurred that make it necessary for us to speak about them, and guide the Muslims in their regard... It's important for us to know that as Muslims, we don't understand what part of Islam these people [terrorists] are following. In fact, we don't even understand what Islam they are following, because Islam is a totally different religion from what these people are practicing... As frustrated as we might be because of what might be happening on Muslim lands, it does not give us the right to go out and hurt people who are not at all involved... If you have a problem with someone, you may report them to the authorities. And then it will handled by the courts. You will either get justice at the courts or sometimes maybe the courts may find someone that you believe is guilty, innocent. In that case, you leave it for the day of judgment, when Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala will be judge. But you do not take it into your own hands, to say now because the court has found this person innocent, and according to me the person is guilty, "Let me harm them, let me kill them, let me hurt them, let me rob from them". That is absolutely incorrect and it is un-Islamic... Two wrongs do not make a right, remember this... If someone has murdered someone else, Subhan Allah, it does not give us the right to murder a third party altogether. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala protect us, and may Allah grant us guidance and ease. It's important we understand this. The world is bleeding today, and people are blaming the Muslims! Because from amongst us, some are being brainwashed. Brainwashed by what? They do not understand verses of the Quran. They don't understand the Asbab al-Nuzul, or reasons of the revelation of the verses of the Quran. They don't understand how to extract rules and regulations from verses of the Quran. They read something, someone shows them something and next thing they are prepared to give up their lives. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala grant us an understanding. We should be giving up our lives striving to earn the pleasure of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala through obedience, through Salah. Look at Muhammad sallā llāhu 'alay-hi wa-sallam when he went to Ta'if, look at his example. They beat him up personally, physically, he was bleeding and the angels came to him to say "If you want, we can crush these people between the mountains". What did he say? He said "I am sent as a mercy. We don't want that to happen. If they don't accept, perhaps their children will accept." Patience, Sabr... And we think that the non-Muslims are our enemies – the minute we think that, automatically we will not be able to call them towards Islam. And they will get the wrong image of Islam. My brothers and sisters, Islam, it means peace, it stands for peace, it promotes peace, it teaches peace, and everything that you will achieve is peace. In this world peace, in the next peace, in your grave peace, with your children peace, in your environment peace. That is Islam. Anything that destroys that in any way is not Islam. Remember this."

"No matter how angry, never use harsh words on others; for those could be the last words you'll ever say to them. Choose to be kind always."

"Then we have Sūrat al-Sharḥ, also known as al-Inshirāḥ. I need to make mention of this because in it is a lot of comfort for myself and yourselves. We have a problem in life. When we have a problem Allah says, "Don't worry, with that difficulty, there is ease." You will never know what ease is all about unless you've been through difficulty. Those who have a beautiful life, sometimes they are still worried and depressed because they don't know what it is like to have suffered a little bit. So Allah's blessing, he makes us suffer slightly so that when there's a little bit of ease, mashallah. You know, a man who's always driven a Rolls-Royce will never know what it's like to ride a bicycle to work. Two ways of making them ride. One is, the doctor tells you you're about to die, Allahu Akbar, and you need to ride to work. Immediately everything is given up. Why? Because we're worried about dear life. That's why. If you see people – Subhan Allah – I've seen a man who had a carrot, and he was pretending like he's smoking this carrot and nibbling on it. And I told him, I said: "My brother, what made you nibble on this carrot?" He says: "My doctor told me I can't smoke, and a good replacement is a carrot." I said: "Allahu Akbar, you're stuffing your mouth with a carrot because of a doctor, but when Allah told you smoking is bad, then you didn't want to listen..." Allahu Akbar. May Allah make us from amongst those who eat carrots rather than smoking cigarettes. Really. So, my brothers and sisters, it's a reality. Whenever there is a person who has tasted goodness alone, and they don't know what difficulty is about, there comes a time when they do not appreciate what they have. So like I was saying, two ways. One is, Allah snatches it away from you, so you now have nothing. So many people have climbed the peak in terms of materialistic items, and then they've dropped down the mountain. They say it's easier to drop from the top than it is from the bottom. Allahu Akbar. When you arrive at the top, a small movement and you roll down, you're with the avalanche, one time. And when you're at the bottom, they can kick you – if you drop, you stand up again and you're walking – same level, masshalah, it's all about altitude. May Allah protect us. Another thing is, when you drop from the top, greater likelihood of breaking more bones. When you drop from the bottom, "Ah, I might have just hurt my head slightly", just say "Ouch" and carry on. May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala protect us and grant us humbleness. So, remember, sometimes Allah wants you to go down, so that you appreciate the bicycle after you had nothing, yet ten years ago you had the Rolls-Royce. May Allah bless us. So Allah says, and I'm sure we know verses, verse number five and six: فَإِنَّ مَعَ الْعُسْرِ يُسْرً إِنَّ مَعَ الْعُسْرِ يُسْرًا "Indeed, with every difficulty [or, with difficulty] there is ease. And indeed, with the difficulty there is ease." [...] May Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala alleviate the suffering that we are all going through in our own little ways. Remember it's a gift of Allah. To keep you in check sometimes. To keep you calling out to Him. May Allah open our doors."

"You can search the world for happiness but you won't find it until you start being content with what the Almighty has already given you."

"There's no need to be popular & win the approval of others. The Almighty did not create you for this purpose. Stay true to yourself."

"We all have examinations in life, different types of examinations. And each one has to try very hard. As you know, in a set up where there is a school, or a university, at the end of every semester, trimester or term, you would have some examinations, in order to qualify you to get to the next level. And as you progress in life, the examinations become more and more difficult. And you would know that without working, we don't achieve. We know the common saying, "Whoever works very hard will definitely see the fruit of that particular working." So just like we have people who fail because they did not work hard, or they did not understand that the examination would become more and more difficult as time passes, we also have an issue with the Dīn where, as we progress in life, we will have more and more tests, and they become more and more difficult until we meet with Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. And this is why the Prophet S.A.W. was told "Worship your Rabb [Lord] until death overtakes you. Worship your Rabb until the end. Right up to the end. Keep on worshiping. Continue. Do not stop, do not pause, do not lose hope. In fact, progress and become stronger and stronger." If you take a look at some of the other verses of the Quran, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala makes mention of Muhammad sallā llāhu 'alay-hi wa-sallam delivering the message. It was not easy. And it was difficult, he faced so many challenges. He continued, and he persevered. Twenty three whole years of nubuwwah. And Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala says, when you have, Subhan Allah! Subhan Allah! You know, the achievement that Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala granted him, Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala will grant each person achievement according to his will obviously but also connected to the effort that that particular person makes. If we were to give up suddenly, we would never be able to achieve even Jannah. [...] So it's important for us to know that to give up... you don't know how close you are to the end! Imagine a person digging a tunnel, for example, and right when they are near the end they suddenly give up thinking that you know what, I don't know how long this is going to carry on for. Had they carried on for a minute longer they would have broken through! So with us we need to continue, fulfill your Salah, progress, develop. Don't think for a moment that life is going to become any easier. The only thing that will happen is, with the development of the link with Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, we become more content, we understand the nature of the world. We understand the nature of the tests of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala, so we enjoy going through them in the sense that we are content. We are happy with the decree of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala. So my brothers and sisters, not only do I say work hard to achieve here in the Dunyā – and may Allah bless you and grant you success in these examinations – but even in the Akhirah we ask Allah to bless you, to open your doors. To prepare for the Akhirah, it's not an easy task, but with the hope in the mercy of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala things will be made easy, and at the same time, with the constant preparation, without giving up hope – never ever giving up, never saying no, never just throwing the towel – by the will of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala we will achieve, and we will achieve great heights."

"When giving advice, do so kindly. Do it sincerely with patience. Don't do it to show that you are more intelligent or better than others."

"Be wary of people who stab you in the back repeatedly & then behave like they're the ones who have been wronged. It's best to avoid them."

"And the same applies to the spouse. You know you love them, but you need to say it again and again. Like we got to the food, moments ago, and you need to say: "This food is – mashallah – it's really, really great". Even if the salt is a little bit more. Because sometimes, as I was saying, she spent so much time bringing it in front of us – and we are worried about how it's smelling, number one, and number two is we say, as we taste it, "The salt is too much, no?" What are you talking about? She just looks at you and her face flops. «I've been at it for three hours here, four hours I've been busy with this for so many months...» And what does she even say? "Next time I'll try a bit harder" – that's if she's a good woman; if not, she will say: "Never gonna cook this again!" It's typical. And if you have someone who is very witty: "The next time there's salt to be put in, I'll call you to put it." So we need to praise the cooking of our wives, we need to praise their dress code, especially... For example, I can let you know something that has worked, for some people. When you find some women, you know, they don't like to dress appropriately, so the husband sometimes wants to tell them something. There're two, three ways of doing it. You can either say, "This is very bad, I don't want you to wear this." And, you know, you might have a response. But if you want a response from the heart, what you do is, you tell them: "The other dress looked much better than this." You see, so you are praising one thing, and that praise is not there when the other thing is there. So, you have told them, in a way, that «this is what I really love». And go beyond the limits in praise – that's your wife, don't worry, you can say whatever you want, mashallah, in terms of goodness. Like the food, when you eat, even if it is a little bit this way or that way, just praise it, mashallah. See what it is. Praise the effort, at least. Let me tell you what has happened once. They say the imam in the mosque had said: "You need to praise the cooking of your wife". Just like I said now. So the man went home, and he had this meal, and he was looking at it, and looking at his wife, and smiling, all happy, mashallah, excited and everything. And when he finishes, he says: "Oh! It was awesome!" And the wife says, "What? I've been cooking for you for 21 years, you never said that! Today, when the food came from the neighbor, you want to say it was awesome?""

"I drive up to Woodlands Cemetery and work out from newspaper photos where Savile’s grave must be. His headstone – a vast granite triptych with the inscription It Was Good While It Lasted, a DJ’s last glib jingle – was pulverised at midnight two years before, its fragments used for landfill. Someone appears to have laid a single flower on the grassy knoll, unless the wind filched a tribute from an undisgraced grave. A tag with the council logo is tied on the fence behind, in line with the mound. Is that so they know where he is in case of exhumation or removal? Others seem to be following this ghoulish route; a group arrive as I leave. There is a sense of not being able to believe the scale of the fall until seeing what was an extravagant shrine (to a man called “a saint” in BBC coverage) but is now just scruffy lawn."