"Zbruyev. So, I need to give flowers, and my girl seems familiar, but on the other hand, she is completely unfamiliar. So what flowers should I give: white or red?"

"Ed Sahely as a Mountie (uncredited)"

"You know, a mountain never meets a mountain, but Muhammad meets Muhammad..."

"[the drunkard points the gun at Zbruev. Zbruev instantly knocks him down and disarms him]"

"Kevin J. O'Connor as Roy Boy"

"Bill Nunn as Kabral Jabar"

"Gordon Michael Woolvett as a Male Candy Striper (uncredited)"

"…You see, comrade captain, I have six brides… but I took it lightly! I passed by the first one… underestimated the second one… and overestimated myself! And most importantly, the sixth one! Love is not sighs on garden benches, right? Do you understand me?!"

"Saleswoman in the train. Newspapers, magazines, cigarettes, Cuban cigars 40 kopecks each."

"Rhea Perlman as Honey"

"Kevin Pollak as Stuart "Stu" Smiley"

"John Candy as Bud B. Boomer, the sheriff of Niagara County"

"G. D. Spradlin as R.J. Hacker"

"James Carville as a Pentagon agent for Central Intelligence (uncredited)"

"Drozdova. Excuse me, please. Could you install a shower in my bathroom?"

"Ben Hamper and Michael Moore as two redneck guys"

"Stanley Anderson as Edwin S. Simon"

"Beth Amos as Ruthie"

"I want to say to Prime Minister MacDonald: Surrender her pronto, or we'll level Toronto."

"[being held in Canada] Boomer! You traitor! You Benedict Arnold! You took off and you left me here in the hands of those Canadians! I'm gonna tear you till and I'll rip out every bone in your body! Boomer, you hear me?!"

"If you say "please" one more time, I'm gonna let you have it!"

"Sheila Gray as the voice of the Hacker Hellstrom"

"Alan Alda as the unnamed President of the United States"

"If life hands you a lemon, you gotta crush it into lemonade."

"Steven Wright as a Niagara Falls Mountie"

"Priest. [reads the magazine in suburban train] Yes, it's a pity."

"Rip Torn as General Dick Panzer, the Commander of USSOCOM"

"What about Jurassic Park? Two black guys died in that movie. That's a twofer!"

"Dan Aykroyd as an OPP officer (uncredited)"

"Zbruyev. So you absolutely must get married?"

"Cecily Strong as Dana Dandridge"

"Kristen Schaal as Sandy, the leader of the Dandelions, who is pompously berated by Helen."

"Cedric Yarbrough as Tito"

"Timothy Simons as Stephan"

"Annie Mumolo as Helen Kreagan"

"Ben Falcone as Marty"

"Margo Martindale as Sister Agnes Aluminata"

"There's a time to think, and a time to act. And this, gentlemen, is no time to think."

"Casey Affleck as Cobby Murphy"

"Matt Damon as Rory"

"[repeated line] 6:07."

"You're gonna love him."

"Hong Chau as Dr. Donna Rivera"

"Leonid Kuravlyov as priest"

"I guess I'll go down to Bolivia all by myself."

"Natalya Varley as Galina (bride #5)"

"Elena Solovey as Rimma (bride #4)"

"Tatyana Fyodorova as Valentina Olenyova (bride #6)"

"Natalya Chetverikova as Nadezhda (bride #2)"