"When will the lesson be learned?! When-will-the-lesson-be-learned?! How many more dictators must be wooed, appeased - Good God, given immense privileges! - before we learn?! You cannot reason with a tiger when your head is in its mouth!"

"Nations which go down fighting rise again, and those that surrender tamely are finished."

"Gary Oldman - Sir Winston Churchill, First Lord of the Admiralty, afterwards Prime Minister of the United Kingdom"

"Lily James - Elizabeth Layton"

"Never have I seen such a maelstrom of bad taste and sheer magic."

"Ordinary and uncool as she may be, there's something about her that speaks to us in a language as vital and as pressing as life itself. Never have I seen such a mess of a bad taste and sheer magic. Your humble servant bares witness... just killed our grandmothers, and we thank her for it."

"Hansford Prince - Joe Holiday"

"Cutty Cuthbert - Jimmy"

"Telvin Griffin - Reggie"

"So, upstairs is where Don keeps his underage girls, then?"

"Shane Powers - Dale"

"Phoebe Tonkin - Jane Thornton"

"Olivia Wilde - Ina Conrad"

"Jimmy Ortega - Elephant Wrangler"

"Flea - Bob Levine"

"Troy Metcalf - Orville Pickwick"

"There is no why. [Yoda!]"

"Jovan Adepo - Sidney Palmer"

"Jean Smart - Elinor St. John"

"Tobey Maguire - James McKay"

"There is no why. It wasn't your voice. It wasn't a conspiracy. And it certainly wasn't anything I wrote. There's nothing you could have done differently. There's nothing you can do. Your time has run out. There is no why. Stop questioning it."

"When in doubt, say something in French."

"Never talk to Elinor! Pretend you can't speak English!"

"So, we're talking an elephant, plus Garbo, plus others tonight at Don Wallach's house, is that right?"

"It was brillig, and the slithy toves..."

"[After Jane Thornton overdoses on cocaine] Wake up! Wake up! Wake up!"

"Dabadabadabadabadab said the Monkey to the Chimp!"

"In a hundred years, when you and I are both long gone, any time someone threads a frame of yours through a sprocket, you will be alive again. You see what that means? One day, every person on every film shot this year will be dead. And one day, all those films will be pulled from the vaults, and all their ghosts will dine together, and adventure together, go to the jungle, to war together. A child born in 50 years will stumble across your image flickering on a screen and feel he knows you, like... like a friend, though you breathed your last before he breathed his first. You've been given a gift. Be grateful. Your time today is through, but you'll spend eternity with angels and ghosts."

"Brad Pitt - Jack Conrad"

"This is when you kiss the apparition."

"First you have to assume the pose of the mongoose!"

"Nellie dresses low 'cause Nellie is low. Now, let me tell you about the time I fought a rattlesnake."

"Marbled meadows metamorphose into the medieval plains of Iberia. Soldiers swarm the fields like flecks of paint from a madman's brush as your humble servant bears witness to the latest of the moving picture's magic tricks. - - Oh, why do I bother? Look at these idiots! I knew Proust, you know."

"Oh God, please forgive us! You sent us this beautiful light and we're squandering it!"

"We'll serve sandwiches in the shape of her face!"

"Margot Robbie - Nellie LaRoy"

"So, do you like warm syrup or do you let the pancakes do that?"

"Who sneezed?! Who the fuck sneezed?! [Walks up to crew man] Kike-nosed, hymie-hole piece of mongoloid shit! I see you! Oh, I see you right there you little shylock dickface! Wipe your nose again! Wipe your little hook nose again, you menorah motherfucker! [Walks back to stage] Now, does anybody else here need to sneeze?! Huh?! Does anyone here need to fuck this scene in the ass?! Camera! And sound!"

"Did you know Michelangelo painted the entire Sistine Chapel on his back?"

"[Stuck in the catacombs] It's getting really late."

"And this boy, who breathed his first decades after you breathed your last, will look at your image and think he's found a friend."

"This is not a low art!"

"My last idea is the best."

"Sir, George won't come out of the car. He's insisting I drive him off the nearest cliff."

"Honey, you don't become a star. Either you are one or you ain't. I am."

"Diego Calva - Manny Torres"

"Hola, Carmelita! [Turns to his fiancée Estelle] I have no idea who that was."

"[Over the phone to Manny] Don't say a word. I'm happy for you. You deserve this. Now go and show those fat fucks how it's done!"

"I'm not asking you to fuck him, just make him feel special."