"Molly Shannon as Mary Katherine Gallagher"

"These are my BREASTS. They're so BIG. I need a BRA to strap them and support because they're so HUGE they need to be …"

"Are you aware that I am rubber/glutter, and you are glue, and whatever you say to me bounces off, of me, and sticks t…"

"Sometimes, when I get nervous, I stick my hands under my armpits and then I smell them like this!"

"[to Evian] Well, you should be embarrassed because your parents named you after bottled water!"

"[to Evian] If I was Sissy Spacek in the movie Carrie, I'm gonna use my telekinesis to KILL you!"

"Your birthmark looks like shit!"

"SUPERSTAR!"

"[to Evian] Go drink a bottle of yourself!"

"Will Ferrell as Sky Corrigan/Jesus"