"Pick-up guy: This reminds me of a joke. This guy, he comes into a bar, walks up to the bartender and says, "Bartender, I got me a bet for you. I'm gonna bet you 300 dollars that I can piss into that glass over there and not spill a single solitary drop." The bartender says—now, one more time, this glass is like a good ten feet away—he says, "Now, wait a minute. Let me get this straight. You're trying to tell me you're gonna bet me 300 dollars that you can piss, standing over here, waaay over there, into that glass, and not spill a single drop?" The guy looks up smiling and says, "That's right." The bartender says, "Young man, you got a bet!" The guy says, "Okay, here we go, here we go." He pulls out his thang. He's looking at the glass, man, he's thinking about the glass, he's thinking about the glass, he thinks, "Glass," he's thinking of the glass, thinks, "Glass," thinking about his dick. Dick, glass. Dick, glass. Dick, glass. Be the glass. Dick, glass. Dick, glass. Dick, glass. And then, swooosh. He lets it rip! And he's... he's pissing all over the place, man! He's pissing on the bar... he's pissing on the stools, on the floor, on the phone... on the bartender... he's pissing everywhere except the fucking glass! Right. Okay, so, bartender, he's laughing his fucking ass off, he's 300 dollars richer. He's like, "Ha ha ha ha." Piss dripping off his face. "Ha ha ha ha." He says, "You fucking idiot, man. You pissed in everything except the glass! You owe me 300 dollars, puta." And he goes, "Excuse me just one, one second." Goes in the back of the bar, and in the back there's a couple of guys playing pool. He walks over to them... comes back to the bar and goes, "Here you go, Mr. Bartender, three." And the bartender's like, "What the fuck are you so happy about? You just lost 300 dollars, you idiot." The guy says, "Well, you see those guys over there? I just bet them 500 dollars apiece that I could piss on your bar, piss on your floor, piss on your phone, and piss on you, and not only would you be not mad about it... you'd be happy.""