"[in TV ad] New and improved Joker products! With the new secret ingredient - Smylex! Now, let's go over to our blind taste test. Uh-oh. He don't look happy. He's been using Brand X! [extends X sound as a hiss] But with new and improved Joker brand...I get a grin, again and again! That luscious tan! Those ruby lips! And hair color so natural, only your undertaker knows for sure! I know what you're saying: 'Where can I get these fine new items?' Well, that's the gag. Chances are, you've bought 'em already! So remember, put on a happy face!"