"One of Feinstein's main exercises in the classroom is the open expression of caring for friends- what she calls "put-ups," the antonym of "put-downs." Homophobia stands foursquare in the way of boys' showing their affection to each other. But she persists, and the put-ups get closer to their intended mark. "At first, the boys will think and think and say something like, 'You play sports good.'" Eventually though, they begin to use the exercise not only to assess another person positively but also to acknowledge a relationship. "More and more, they'll say things like 'You've helped me with math. You've been a good friend.'" Feinstein thinks the homophobic restraints on masculine affection might also thwart boys' playfulness and tenderness in heterosexual sex- and that learning to express closeness openly could do the opposite."