"Goldo Golderson. Now there's a name that's just asking for trouble. Goldie Goldigger was his mother. She always favou…"

"I have seen evil masters come and go: Exploded, disintegrated, immolated... Even one time eaten by a giant weasel!"

"You can now control 15 minnions. 15! That's twice the braincells in the average sheep."

"Go on, be off with you. I want to see some proper evil being done out there."

"Some young harlot, I imagine, with full breasts and an empty head."

"Well that's just typical of her! Er, of her type, I mean, Sire. A silly little wench, too daft enough to know what sh…"

"I've never seen the point of slugs. They seem to exist merely to be squashed."

"[About Jewel] She's barely left the crib. That young lady needs a smacked bottom."

"Reckless Orchestrator of Minion Deaths!"

"Now dwarves, Sire, dwarves are like angry beards on legs. Angry beer-soaked beards on legs!"