Scream (1996 film)

"Would you settle for a PG-13 relationship?"

"I'm sorry if my traumatized life is an inconvenience to your perfect existence."

"You sick fucks. You've seen one too many movies!"

"[Billy: Hello?] [as Ghostface] Are you alone in the house? [Billy: Bitch! You bitch! Where the fuck are you?!] Not so fast. We're gonna play a little game. It's called [normal voice] "Guess Who Just Called the Police and Reported Your Sorry Motherfucking Ass"! [Billy: Find her, you dipshit! Get up!] [Stu: I can't, Billy. You already cut me too deep. I think I'm dying here, man.] [Billy: [puts phone on Stu and whispers] ] [Stu: Hello?] Ohh, Stu, Stu, Stu. What's your motive? Billy's got one. The police are on their way. What are you going to tell them? [Stu: Peer pressure. I'm far too sensitive.] [Billy: We'll rip you up, you bitch, just like your fucking mother!] You've gotta find me first, you pansy-ass mama's boy!"

"[Ghostface: Do you like scary movies?] What's the point? They're all the same. Some stupid killer stalking some big-breasted girl who can't act who is always running up the stairs when she should be running out the front door. It's insulting."

"You know, if, if I was wrong about Cotton Weary, then the killer's still out there."

"But this is life. This isn't a movie."

"How do you...gut someone?"

"[after Randy tells him to never say "be right back"] I'm getting another beer. Want one? [Randy: Yeah, sure.] I'll be right back!!"

"Everybody dies but us. We get to carry on and plan the sequel, 'cause—let's face it, baby—these days, you gotta have a sequel."

"[after Sidney calls the police] My mom and dad are gonna be so mad at me!"

"When do we see breasts? I wanna see Jamie Lee's breasts. When do we see Jamie Lee's breasts?"

"I can't, Billy. You cut me too deep. I think I'm dying here, man."

"[after Gale reveals that she was still alive] She looked dead, man. Still does."

"[after Billy compares Sidney's mother to Sharon Stone.] We put her out of her misery, 'cause, let's face it, Sid, your mother was no Sharon Stone!"

"[after he finds that Gale has stolen the gun] Um, Houston, we have a problem!"

"I will totally protect you. Yo, I am so buff, I got you covered, girl."

"See, it's a fun game, Sidney. We ask you questions and if you get one wrong, boo-gah, you die."

"[after dragging out Sidney's beaten, bound, and gagged father] What's behind door number three, Sidney?"

"What do I have to do to prove to you that I'm not a killer?"

"[after Randy says that Stu has gone completely mad] "We all go a little mad sometimes." [shoots Randy in the shoulder] Anthony Perkins, Psycho. Mmm, corn syrup: same stuff they used for pigs' blood in Carrie."

"[after Sidney says that they've seen one too many scary movies] Now, Sid, don't you blame the movies; movies don't create psychos, movies make psychos more creative!"

"Loose the titties."

"[after Stu tells Sidney she dies if she gets a question wrong] If you get it right, you die."

"[to Sidney] That woman was a slut-bag whore who flashed her shit all over town like she was Sharon Stone or something!"

"It's called subtlety, Stu. You should look it up."

"[after he tells Sidney to play a game called "Guess How I'm Gonna Die?" and she says "Fuck you!"] We already played that game, remember?"

"[to Sidney after she says that life isn't a movie] Sure it is, Sid. It's all a movie. It's all a great big movie. Only you can pick your genre."

"[when Sidney asks why they're murdering people] It's all part of the game, Sidney. It's called "Guess How I'm Gonna Die?"!"

"It works better without the safety on."

"You hear that, Stu? I think she wants a motive. Well, I don't really believe in motives Sid; I mean, did Norman Bates have a motive? Did we ever find out why Hannibal Lecter liked to eat people? Don't think so! See, it's a lot scarier when there's no motive."

"[last words] Say hello to your mother! [gets poked through his umbrella stab wound and screams; almost stabs Sidney, but he gets shot in the right shoulder by Gale] [Gale: Guess I remembered the safety that time, you bastard.] [his supposed dead body is examined] [Randy: Careful. This is the moment when the supposedly dead killer comes back to life for one last scare.] [wakes up to try to attack; Gale screams, but Sidney shoots him through the head] [Sidney: Not in my movie.]"

"Don't go there, Sid; you're starting to sound like some Wes Carpenter flick."

"Billy and his penis don't deserve you, okay?"

"Oh, you wanna play psycho killer? Okay, let's see. [mock terror] Oh, please don't kill me, Mr. Ghostface. I wanna be in the sequel!"

"Well, you're not going to be alone any more, right? If you pee, I pee. Is that clear?"

"[to Dewey] The Janitor's your superior."

"There are certain rules that one must abide by in order to successfully survive a horror movie For instance, number one: you can never have sex."

"[after Stu says that he wants to see Jamie Lee Curtis's breasts in Halloween] Breasts? Not until Trading Places in '83. Jamie Lee was always a virgin in horror movies. She never showed her tits 'til she went legits."

"If you were the only suspect in a senseless bloodbath—would you be standing in the horror section?"

"Now that Billy tried to mutilate her, do you think Sid would go out with me?"

"[when Randy reveals that he's still alive, and Sidney says that she thought that he was dead] I probably should be. I never thought I'd be so happy to be a virgin."

"There's always some stupid bullshit reason to kill your girlfriend. That's the beauty of it all! Simplicity! Besides, if it gets too complicated, you lose your target audience."

"It's the millennium. Motives are incidental."

"See, you push the laws and you end up dead. Okay, I'll see you in the kitchen with a knife."

"The police are always off track with this shit! If they'd watch Prom Night, they'd save time! There's a formula to it—a very simple formula! EVERYBODY'S A SUSPECT!!"

"This is the moment when the supposedly dead killer comes back to life, for one last scare."

"[lighthearted, curious tone] What's your favorite scary movie?"

"[after Casey tells him to listen to her] No, you listen to me, you little bitch!; If you hang up on me again and I'll gut you like a fish, you understand?."

"[Casey says she's going to call the cops] They'd never make it in time!"