"Amelia, this riffraff, as you call him, is really the salt of the earth. All he needs is to be iodized."

"Do you imagine I could take advantage, exploit, capitalize on a great scientific discovery? Cheat millions of people …"

"[about Bill Leyden] If the army didn't need him, I would have committed him to the squirrel pen at Idlewild Sanitariu…"

"[Signing the mortgage] "Contractum sanctum putnam," which means done and dished up!"

"It isn't in Brampton's room. That proves he did it! He's covering up!"

"Silvio, the Human Bomb: In this sack, I have forty kilos of dynamite, and I don't mean ravioli!"

"IT'S A CHILLER-DILLER OF A MAYHEM-AND-MERRIMENT SHOW!"

"From HORROR To HOWLS...FROM MAYHEM TO MERRIMENT!"

"There's fun in this new type of horror picture...fun for everybody, and everybody loads of fun!"

"You'll be tickled to death over this gay chiller diller!"