"[When hitting Cragpoles with the Gyro-Cycle] YES! Thats gonna add a few points to my license!"

"Deadmeat! Its dark in here! So... scared!"

"He just can't seem to land a hit, folks. This guy must be more irritated than a one-legged droid in butt kicking cont…"

"See how our opponent flees his attackers. His hand between his legs, his eyes filled with tears... I taught him that …"

"[When you equip the Razor Claws] Gotta love Razor claws. Lethal, precise, and stunning to look at! Like me, Captain Q…"

"[When you equip the Tornado Launcher] Sweet Jupiter! What kind of black magic voodoo does this guy wield?! He control…"

"[When you equip the Buzz Blades] Hey hey hey! You could've taken someone's eye out with those things!"

"Whoa, that looked painful! I would turn away if I weren't already completely desensitized by Holonet violence."

"Tired of losing crop after crop of jellyweed thanks to fossilmite infestation? Try Grummelnet's new and improved Lawn…"

"[After crashing hoverbike] Well, looks like we're going on foot. At least I can try out my new nav-unit."