"Nico: I never knew vampires could do sex."

"Dallas: That's a myth. With a good commercial lubricant we could go for hours."

"Taste the evil. Taste the fun."

"Welcome to Transylvania in the Hollywood hills."

"A degree from a university? From a credentialist scam for laundering privilege? Amazing."

"99.9% of what's called activism is really personal exhibitionism and brand maintenance in disguise."

"I mean, I follow a very strict reverse-aging diet and therapy program. It's very expensive, as you can imagine, but I…"

"You miserable fucking idiot, do you know what you've done?"

"You can't beat me because you are a loser and I'm a winner and that's fucking life!"

"And the hour is almost upon us. Yay!"