"I've got a... Uh... Uh... Oh yeah, a pornographic memory!"

"I had a cat once. It tasted like chicken... What? I was hungry and the store was, like, closed."

""The Pope is dead. Long live the Pope". I must confess that I don't see what the fuss is about... He's just a regular…"

"[to Marcus] You lie to your inflatable doll!!?"

"Do I look like a fucking people person?"

"You call placing duct tape with sticky side up on the floor with cheese on it a mouse trap?"

"I'm afraid we have a lunatic on our hands... Look he's doing it again! That same man from yesterday just drove by and…"

"So, you heard about the guy that got sent to jail for sharing Daredevil with Bittorrent? Serves him right, spreading …"

""Before you can love others, you must first love yourself". If you all excuse me, I'll be in the bathroom so hold all…"

"Should we tell him that "zapatista" has nothing to do with "Frank Zappa"?"