"You know, it's amazing: I can remember Janice Wu with perfect clarity, I just can't remember where the deed is. You know why? Because I didn't fuck the deed."

"Karen: If I wanted my face covered in lies, I'd still be in porn."

"Leave your baggage behind."

"Paul Rudd - George Gergenblatt"

"Jennifer Aniston - Linda Gergenblatt"

"Justin Theroux - Seth"

"Malin Åkerman - Eva"

"Lauren Ambrose - Almond Cohen"

"Joe Lo Truglio - Wayne Davidson"

"Alan Alda - Carvin Wiggins"

"Kathryn Hahn - Karen"

"[singing] This is the dawning of the age of Aquarius, the age of Aquarius!"

"Of course I'm crazy! We're all crazy. Let's shake on it."

"The draft is white people sending black people to make war on the yellow people to defend the land they stole from the red people!"

"Oh say, can you see / my eyes? If you can / then my hair's too short."

"I've been to India And saw the yogi light In South America The Indian smoke glows bright I'm reincarnated and so are we all And in this lifetime We'll rise before we fall"