Kelly Osbourne

"Jack, stop telling people you're Ozzy Osbourne's son to get into places, you're a fucking loser!"

"You haven't done anything, its your fucking daughter. I just got a call --when I'm in Tiffany-- from some woman telling me how I should prepare my vagina for my gynecologist appointment tomorrow. She booked me a fucking gynecologist appointment!"

"Yeah, that's what I was wondering!! Who the fuck is Will Rogers?"

"You don't go to someone's father, "I don't like the redness in your hair". It's fucking rude. I would never go to her father, "Oh, I don't like the baldness, maybe you should get a fucking tupee."

"You're not driving my car anymore Mum, I'm sorry."

"Mom, I have something to tell you. My thong, is so far up my crack right now."

"My teeth, my car, my vagina, my business."

"I don't really care what people think about my hair. It's my hair, so why should they care? Ooh, that rhymed."

"She's pissing in the bottle....just like she shit in Dad's bag of weed in Hawaii."

"Jack, you have like serious anger management issues."

"If you kick every Latino out of this country, then who is going to be cleaning your toilet, Donald Trump?"

"With parents like heavy metal rocker Ozzy Osbourne and entertainment impresario/personality Sharon Osbourne, you might have anger management issues, too."