"I told you about these people. They're evil, Edwin. They must be stopped."

"You ever read any Nietzsche? Nietzsche says there's two kinds of people in the world: people who are destined for gre…"

"I wish there was some way I could just pay the fine and go home."

"Some billionaire's got the Holy Grail in his library on Fifth Avenue."

"I'm a knight on a special quest."

"There's three things in this world that you need: Respect for all kinds of life, a nice bowel movement on a regular b…"

"It begins with the king as a boy, having to spend the night alone in the forest to prove his courage so he can become…"

"Jack, I may be going out on a limb here, but you don't seem like a happy camper."

"What were the crusades? The pope's publicity stunt?"

"It's important to think. It's what separates us from lentils."