Willy's Wonderland

"Okay, shut up. Guys. If we’re doing this, we’re gonna do this as a mission, not a field trip. Are you with me or not?"

"I’m sorry, but I’m just not okay with letting somebody burn alive in there if we can do something about it."

"[to The Janitor] Thank God you’re still alive. We gotta get you outta here. I stopped that bitch, but that won’t keep her away for long, so… [as The Janitor walks away] Hey! Did you not hear what I just said? [as The Janitor leaves The Fairy Room] Hey!"

"Guys, guys, it’s happening. It’s happening now. [walking up to Siren Sara] Oh, that’s the nasty bitch that tried to kill me."

"This town has a dark history and it all starts with this horrible place."

"[to Sheriff Eloise Lund] You don’t understand. You’ve locked the wrong guy up in here. He's not trapped in there with them. They're trapped in here with him."

"What’s worse, the dead body you saw, or the guy that you left to die? Are you ready to be a murderer? Because that’s exactly what you’re gonna be. You’re gonna be a cold-blooded… [The tires squeal as Deputy Evan Olson stops the police car]"

"Then what are you? You’re complicit. You’re just another cult member recruited by the sheriff to do all of her dirty work."

"You don’t know what it’s like living with her. My entire life, it’s like I’ve been a ghost. And no matter what I do, it doesn’t change who she is. So I thought maybe I could do something right and burn this fucking place down. So I am doing something. What about you? Hmm? You just gonna sit there and watch all of this happen and not do anything about it?"

"[in a commercial] Hey, kids! You know what time it is? It's birthday time! [singing with other animatronics] It's your birthday, and we want you to have fun. It's your birthday, so let's party everyone. It's your birthday, and we want you to have fun. It's your birthday, so let's party everyone. [speaking] Okay now, kids. Clap your hands like there's no tomorrow. [singing with other animatronics] We welcome you to Willy's, where everyone's your friend. [speaking] That's right. [singing with other animatronics] Here at Willy's Wonderland, the good times never end. Birthday fun for everyone, how old are you today? Everyone at Willy's is hoping you will stay. [speaking] Forever! [singing with other animatronics] It's birthday time, it's birthday time, it's birthday time. Let's cheer at Willy's Wonderland! [speaking] Proudly serving families since 1984."

"[singing with other animatronics] We’re All Friends. We Like to Play. Play, play, play every night and day. We’re All Friends. We Like to Sing. Sing, sing, sing; it’s a wonderful thing! We’re All Friends. We Like to Run. Run, run, run to the beat of the drum. We’re All Friends. We Like to Dance. Dance, dance, dance like there’s ants in our pants. [speaking] Have you been to my Super Happy Fun Room yet? Well, what are you waiting for? [singing with other animatronics] The Super Happy Fun Room is super happy fun. Join us in the Fun Room, where you’ll be number one. Popcorn, cake, and hot dogs, soda and candy too. The Super Happy Fun Room."

"Look at all these naughty birthday boys and birthday girls. I think it’s time for them to go nightie night. [singing with other animatronics] It’s your birthday and we want you to have fun. [Their voices distort] It’s your birthday, so let’s kill everyone..."

"[At the end of the movie, popping out of a gray screen as a cartoon version of himself, to the audience] And remember, friends, the party never ends! [offscreen, singing with other animatronics] At Willy's Wonderland!"

"[to The Janitor] I'm gonna feast on your face!"

"Oh. Stupid idiots. It’ll just incite him more. [to Willy Weasel, apologetically] Willy, this guy does not act for us. His actions should in no way reflect on the town of Hayesville. You know that, right, Willy? [to Deputy Evan Olson, holding The Janitor at gunpoint] Well, cuff him. For God’s sakes, cuff him."

"I’ll give you two reasons why you are: your wife and your kid. If we don’t do what needs to be done, nobody in this county is safe. [to The Janitor, as Deputy Evan Olson cuffs The Janitor's hands together] Why couldn’t you just die? [to Liv Hawthorne] Where are the others?"

"[watching as The Janitor puts the bagged animatronics in the dumpster] That G.D. S.O.B. [The Janitor waves at her] Well, I’ll be a son of a bitch. [to The Janitor, holding him at gunpoint] Hold it right there, boy. Inside, now! [marching The Janitor into Willy's Wonderland] Move! We had a good thing, but you just went and fucked it all up. Look at me. Look at me when I’m talking to you. All you had to do was die. Was that so hard? No, you just had to go ahead and stay alive, and now we got five dead kids because of you! You might have taken apart a few electronics, but I got a feeling that you can’t stop a round. [to Willy Weasel] Willy! [to The Janitor] Willy needs to eat, and I’m gonna feed him. [to Willy Weasel] Willy, come and get it! [Suddenly, the lights go out. Willy Weasel appears behind her and slices her in half. Both of her halves fall to the floor]"

"[to The Janitor] Yeah, I tell everybody that attempts the 50, there ain’t shit out here, but you gotta be prepared for anything. A bunch of fun-loving kids stole the zigzag out of the back of the sheriff’s pickup a month ago. Guess you found it for ’em. [He laughs] You know what some folks consider funny? Just ruin a man’s whole damn day. God’s honest truth. Now, where’d you say you’re from? Oh, you’re one of those guys that don’t wanna look back, huh? You’re one where the past lives in the past, huh? Yeah, I understand. No, I can’t blame you. I mean, we all got so much baggage. I just say, move forward. You’re a rolling stone. Yup. We had a car chase around here a while back. Some boy got up to 150 miles an hour, just launched it right off Tension’s Peak, man. It’s like a superhero. It went fwoom! Carnage was terrible. It was just… wow."

"Hey, it’s gonna be about $250 for the tow, and we’ll need all four tires replaced. And there was something wrong with that chip, I think. But I can fix it for about $1,000. Yep. [The Janitor pulls a credit card out of his wallet] No, cash only. Uh-uh, no. And in advance. Yeah, I don’t take no plastic credit cards. [The Janitor sees an ATM machine with an "Out of order" sign] Oh, that over there. [Jed Love chuckles] Yeah, we ain’t got no internet in Hayesville. Yeah, so all the ATMs, they just don’t work. Yeah, we were gonna get it, but they just didn’t. [He laughs] You ain’t got the cash, huh? Now, ain’t that a dilly of a pickle? Hmm. You willing to work it off? Okay, then. I think I’ve got somebody who can accommodate."

"[In the flashback, to The Hawthornes] Well, the good news is, I can fix it. The bad news is, it’s gonna have to sit 'til I get the part. Now, Hayesville’s one hotel’s booked. But I do have a place you can stay tonight. Now, it ain’t the Ritz, but it’s a roof and it’s free if you’re willing to do a little light cleaning."

"Sheriff, if I may, why’d you request the state to send backup for one night to curfew a place the size of a postage stamp? [He laughs] Oh, don’t get me wrong. I got a wife and kid on the way and I do love the overtime pay."

"2020 isn't over yet kids!"

"Their idea of fun is killer!"

"Let playtime begin"

"The Fun Begins This Winter"

"Nicolas Cage as The Janitor"

"Emily Tosta as Liv Hawthorne"

"Beth Grant as Sheriff Eloise Lund"

"David Sheftell as Deputy Evan Olson"

"Ric Reitz as Tex Macadoo"

"Chris Warner as Jed Love"

"Kai Kadlec as Chris Muley"

"Caylee Cowan as Kathy Barnes"

"Terayle Hill as Bob McDaniel"

"Christian Del Grosso as Aaron Powers"

"Jonathan Mercedes as Dan Lorraine"

"Grant Cramer as Jerry Robert Willis"

"Émoi as Willy Weasel"

"Jessica Graves as Siren Sara"

"Madisun Leigh as Cammy Chameleon"

"Abel Arias as Ozzie Ostrich and Tito Turtle"

"Mark Gagliardias as Gus Gorilla"

"Arty Alligator (Unvoiced)"

"Knighty Knight (Unvoiced)"