Creepshow 2

"I've never seen anyone so impatient, Billy... as if your life depended on getting the first copy of the presses."

"Welcome, kiddies, to another edition of Creepshow. It's amazing that you boors and ghouls keep coming back for more. You must be gluttons for punishment, eh? Well... I guess you bloodsuckers enjoy being repulsed, eh? You're loyal to the gore. Well, that's good. We don't want to be dead wood in our fraternity of fright fest. That just happens to be the subject of our first norsky novella, a nasty little bonecracker titled "Old Chief Woodenhead"."

"Well, kiddies, that was quite a price for young Sam Whitemoon to pay... toupée, eh?"

"Still here, kiddies? Well, if "Old Chief Woodenhead" didn't drive you away, you might enjoy this next splintering tale whittled from the same wormwood. It's a splashy little ditty about some people who are left stranded without a paddle on a sea of blood. This bubbly bonbon is titled "The Raft"."

"Well, swimmers, that was um... slick, eh?"

"Young Billy knows his way around town. They won't catch him in a hurry. I think we've got time for one more quickie concoction, a last morbid masterpiece which I call "The Hitchhiker"."

"There's a lesson for you, kiddies. Never pick up hitchhikers... on the hood of your car! Well, it's time for this boogeyman to boogie! I'll be slaying ya, boors and ghouls! 'Til next issue, try to stay scared, eh? Oh... I almost forgot about young Billy. I think he's coming this way... with his friends."

"No more of this baloney, man! No more eating dust for a living! There ain't no dust in Hollywood, man! And there ain't no damn tribe of tomming wimpy red men, neither!"

"How ya doin', lady? Thanks. Thanks for the ride."

"Thanks for the ride, lady! Thanks for the ride!"