"So, despite the fact that you drive me crazy at times,-- Yes, Donkey, I'm looking at you. --it would mean a lot to me if you'd all come back and join us."

"Smelly Christmas to all, and to all a gross night!"

"Merry Christmas, Shrek!"

"How are you gonna have Christmas without your family?"

"My mom used to always say: "Christmas ain't Christmas till somebody cries". Usually, that someone's me [sniffles]"

"[laughs] They got you good, Shrek! [snow dumps on him] Hey! That wasn't even funny. Who did that?"

"This is gonna be the best Christmas ever. And we're going to do it together, so come on. [pulls Shrek's arm]"

"They're our friends, Shrek. They all mean well."

"I have to go. I need to apologize to our friends. [walks away with the babies in her arms]"

"Okay, I will assume the position. [gets himself tortured by the ogre babies]"

"In my homeland, we tell a very different tale of the Santa Nicholas. He's not made of waffles."

"I have shamed myself. [jumps off the chair]"

"Boss, there's no right way to do Christmas, you just do it."

"[talking to an angel-shaped cookie] Did you hurt yourself when you fell out of heaven?"

"Aw, phooey with all your sunshine and lollipops! Where I come from, Christmas is a nightmare!"

"...until they got home, when they looked at the car door handle and they found...A HOOK!"

"Stop, drop, and roll, Shrek!"

"Santa?! AAAAAAHH!!! [slams the door]"

"Pinocchio: C'mon, everybody, let's DANCE!"

"Big Bad Wolf: Apology accepted. Let's go eat."

"3 Little Pigs: Ja, with schnitzel."

"Mike Myers as Shrek"

"Eddie Murphy as Donkey"

"Cameron Diaz as Princess Fiona"

"Antonio Banderas as Puss in Boots"

"Conrad Vernon as Gingy"

"Cody Cameron as Pinocchio and Three Little Pigs"

"Aron Warner as Big Bad Wolf"

"Miles Christopher Bakshi, Nina Zoe Bakshi, and Dante James Hauser as Farkle, Fergus, & Felicia"

"Marissa Jaret Winokur as Bookstore Clerk"

"Gary Trousdale as Santa Claus"

"Beast, I'll make you regret the day we met! I'll see you drawn and cornered! You'll beg for death to save you! [Fiona: No! Shrek!] And as for you, my wife? [Shrek: Fiona!] I'll have you locked back in that tower, for the rest of your days! I AM KING! [Shrek whistles for Dragon] I WILL HAVE ORDER! I WILL HAVE PERFECTION! I WILL HAVE--! [Dragon roars] AAAAAAAH! [Dragon she eat the Farquaad] AAAH-! [Dragon swallows him] [Donkey: Alright, nobody move! I got a dragon here, and I'm not afraid to use it!] [Dragon roars] [Donkey: I'm a donkey on the edge!] [Dragon burps out Farquaad's crown] [Donkey: [chuckles] Celebrity marriages. They never last, do they?]"

"WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS? I MEAN, WHAT SPECIFICALLY?!"

"Puss, you have to save the baby, or the mama will destroy San Ricardo. It's the right thing to do. [Puss in Boots: I will not let you go, Humpty.] I know you won't. So I won't make you choose."

"No! No, no, no, no, no! I'm not ready! No! Wait!"

"[Fiona: [shocked] Shrek?] [Rumpelstiltskin: [surprised] His day is up! His day is... [gets squeezed]] [Fiona: [heartbroken] Shrek?] It's alright. [Fiona: There has to be something I can do.] You've already done everything for me Fiona. You gave me a home and a family. [Fiona: You have kids?] We have kids. Fergus, Farkle, and a little girl named... [simultaneously with Fiona] ...Felicia. [Fiona: [simultaneously with Shrek] Felicia. I've always wanted to have a daughter named Felicia.] And someday... [gives squeaky toy to Fiona] ...you will. [Fiona, Donkey, and Puss sadly stare at Shrek] You know what the best part of today was? I got the chance to fall in love with you all over again. [Shrek and Fiona share true love's kiss, just as Shrek disappears] [Puss in Boots: [notices] Fiona, the sunrise. You're still...an ogre.] [Fiona: [sees Puss in Boots is right] True love's form.] [Rumpelstiltskin: [shocked] Impossible!] [Fiona: [happily] The kiss worked.]"