films-directed-by-robert-rodriguez

"[caught on the top floor of the hotel by Marquez's men] Any suggestions, Ms. "Why don't we get a room on the 5th floor so we can see the beautiful sunset"?"

"Willem Dafoe - Barillo"

"Rubén Blades - Jorge Ramirez"

"Julio Oscar Mechoso - Advisor"

"Cheech Marin - Belini"

"Marco Leonardi - Fideo"

"Enrique Iglesias - Lorenzo"

"Danny Trejo - Cucuy"

"Eva Mendes - Ajedrez"

"Mickey Rourke - Billy"

"Johnny Depp - Sands"

"Salma Hayek - Carolina"

"Antonio Banderas - El Mariachi"

"You know that with-holding vital information from a federal officer is a serious offense. Especially, when that officer has paid handsomely for it and I wouldn’t think twice about ripping that patch off your eye hole and skull fucking you to death."

"[on the phone] Listen, I have got a swell buncha guys intercepting Marquez's army but they've got no guns! Now listen, I want you to understand me. This is no time to screw the pooch because this is supposed to be the big dance number alright? Hello? Hello you there? OK Ok I'm gonna freak right out!"

"From Quentin Tarantino. From Robert Rodriguez. From Dusk Till Dawn."

"[on his impending vampirization] I'll be a lap dog of Satan."

"Alright, pussy, pussy, pussy! Come on in Pussy lovers! Here at the Titty Twister we’re slashing pussy in half! Give us an offer on our vast selection of pussy, this is a pussy blow out! Alright, we got white pussy, black pussy, Spanish pussy, yellow pussy. We got hot pussy, cold pussy. We got wet pussy. We got smelly pussy. We got hairy pussy, bloody pussy. We got snapping pussy. We got silk pussy, velvet pussy, naugahyde pussy. We even got horse pussy, dog pussy, chicken pussy. C'mon, you want pussy, come on in Pussy Lovers! If we don't got it, you don't want it! Come on in Pussy lovers!"

"Attention pussy shoppers! Take advantage of our penny pussy sale! If you buy one piece of pussy at the regular price, you get another piece of pussy of equal or lesser value for only a penny! Try and beat pussy for a penny! If you can find cheaper pussy anywhere, fuck it!"

"[As a vampire] You know what they say about me? I suck!"

"Earl McGraw: Jesus H. Christ, Pete. When you gonna learn that microwave food'll kill you faster than a bullet? I mean, them damn burritos ain't good for nothing but a hippie, when he's high on weed."

"Sex Machine: Now let's kill that fuckin' band."

"I had to work with Harvey Keitel, and my character was supposed to dominate him. Now, nobody but nobody dominates Harvey on screen. I did my best, but when I look at the result, I can see him throw in a gesture, raise an eyebrow, or even take a pause, and he takes focus. That's why he's Harvey Keitel, and I'm just a lucky guy with the best job in the world."

"Do you know what it was like to dance with that snake in a bikini? That's probably the biggest challenge I have ever encountered."

"A terrifying evil has been unleashed. And five strangers are our only hope to stop it."

"Vampires. No Interviews."

"The Showdown is on."

"One night is all that stands between them and freedom. But it's going to be one hell of a night."

"How far can Too Far go?"

"Harvey Keitel - Jacob Fuller"

"George Clooney - Seth Gecko"

"Quentin Tarantino - Richard Gecko"

"Juliette Lewis - Kate Fuller"

"Ernest Liu - Scott Fuller"

"Salma Hayek - Santanico Pandemonium"

"Cheech Marin - Border Guard/Chet Pussy/Carlos"

"Danny Trejo - Razor Charlie"

"Tom Savini - Sex Machine"

"Fred Williamson - Frost"

"Michael Parks - Texas Ranger Earl McGraw"

"Well, your best better get a hell of a lot fucking better, or you are gonna feel a hell of a lot fucking worse. Everybody be cool. You — be cool!"

"Now I'm gonna ask you one question, and all I want is a yes or no answer: Do you wanna live through this?"

"Let me explain the house rules. Follow the rules, we'll get along like a house on fire. Rule number one: No noise, no questions. You make a noise... [holds up gun] Mr. .44 makes a noise. You ask a question, Mr. .44 answers it."

"Don't you ever try and fucking run on us, 'cause I've got six little friends and they can all run faster than you can."

"Do you think this is who I am? I am a professional thief, I don't run around killing people I don't have to."

"I know that I have put you through hell, and I know that I have been one rough pecker. But from here on, you are all in my cool book."

"[puts a gun to Sex-Machine's head] You touch my brother with that stake, biker, and vampires won't have to suck your blood. They'll be able to lick it up off the floor."

"Richie, here is the peace in death that I could not give you in life!"

"I know what's going on. We got a bunch of fucking vampires out there trying to get in here and suck our fucking blood - and that's it, plain and simple! Now I don't want to hear anything about "I don't believe in vampires", 'cause I don't fucking believe in vampires, but I believe in my own two eyes, and what I saw is fucking vampires!"

"So what are you, Jacob? A faithless preacher? Or a mean motherfuckin' servant of God?"