Undercover Brother

"Too funky for myself."

"Ja mon, rasta!"

"Your body's slammin'. Let's get to jammin'."

"Who the hell are you, woman?! You're the Grim Reaper, ain'tcha?! I don't wanna go to hell!"

"Holy Motown!"

"Caucasian overload! Caucasian overload!"

"It's time to say goodbye to Anton Jackson... and say "what it is" to Undercover Brother."

"There's times for falling apart, and there's times for gettin' funky. This is one of those funky times!"

"You mess with the 'fro... you got to go."

"Let me tell you something about the word "good", brother. "Good" is an ancient Anglo-Saxon word "Go-od" meaning "absence of colour", i.e. "It's all Good" which it is, or "Good Will Hunting", meaning, "I'm hunting niggers". So when you say "Good Morning" to me, what you're really saying is "I'm going to kill your black ass first thing in the morning"!"

"Hey, look out, black man, he's got a gun! (gunshot) I'm hit, but my vest caught it, bitch!"

"Oh, shit! It's Macy Grey with pork chop sideburns!"

"The computer! Another idea stolen from the black man!"

"I never trusted that Colonel. Slaves cooked that chicken! Ain't no white man know about no sixteen herbs and spices and giblets!"

"Jesus Christ, black man. Babe Ruth, black man. Madonna... sleeps with black men."

"Oooh, right up the pooper!"

"Gimme a pillow case. I'm joinin' the Klan!"

""Atomic core", eh? Let's see what this so-called button does."

"You're so sweet. And cute, too, in a Theo Huxtable kind of way."

"A girl needs friends, Anton. Would you like to be my friend?"

"They look at you and all they see is a threatening black man. They look at me and all they see are my full breasts and my narrow waist that tapers to my pert backside. It's just not fair."

"It's time to release our secret weapon. I call it... Black Man's Kryptonite."

"Little by little we're blending and merging until one day we're all going to be one united people, living and working and dancing together like the news, or Ally McBeal, or the people that work at Saturn! And we've gotta stop it before it's too late!"

"Everything is "A party over here!" with you people, isn't it?"

"Always trying to shut the white man down."

"I owe all of you a huge apology. I was watching this program... maybe you've seen it. It's called "Roots"?"

"Let me talk to them. I'm white. [to guards] We don't want any trouble."

"I... am not... a SISSYYYYYYYYY!!"

"He's All Action"

"Eddie Griffin – Undercover Brother/Anton Jackson"

"Denise Richards – White She-devil/Penelope Snow"

"Aunjanue Ellis - Sistah Girl"

"Chris Kattan - Mr. Feather"

"Dave Chappelle – Conspiracy Brother"

"Chi McBride – The Chief"

"Neil Patrick Harris – Lance the intern"

"Gary Anthony Williams – Smart Brother"

"Billy Dee Williams – General Warren Boutwell"

"Jack Noseworthy – Mr. Elias"

"Robert Trumbull – The Man"

"James Brown – himself"