The Man Who Would Be King (film)

":Peachy: Blast! [Carnehan realizes he has just pick-pocketed a fellow Freemason's watch]"

"Conductor: All Aboard!"

"Indian passenger:Mr Clutterbury Das...failed entrance examination..Calcutta University, 1863..Writer of correspondence...for the illiterate genera Public"

":Peachy: SHUt UP"

"Indian:Thank you Sir"

"Indian:Thank you Sir {Peachy throws Das out of the door)"

":Peachy: Serves Him right if I did..we're not making five miles an hour"

":Peachy: I have an educated taste in whiskey, women, waistcoats and bills of fare. But I've had few chances..."

"LASt time Danny and me came through the Khyber Pass,we faught our way...yard by bloody yeard...and general Bobbs called us heroes afterwards..But that was years ago..Times have changed....Blast!Look Who's on scntry!"

"Dravit: Mulvaney...that loudmouthed Mick from the Black Tyrone! Private Mulvaney!Come to attention when I am addressing You! Slope arms!Preent!March!Mark time!At the double!"

"Officer"Coproral of the guard! take three menr and put private Mulvaney under arrest!Bloody man's Drunk again!"

"Danny's only a man. But he can break wind at both ends simultaneous — which is more, I reckon, than any god can do."

"They've twigged it Danny, you've had it!"

"We've got to brass it out, Danny. Danny brass it out! Bags of swank!"

"What's this? God's holy trousers!Tickets again?"

"He's gone south for the week. Did he say I'd give anything for this? I won't."

"- Then why did you do it?"

"He said south, did he?"

"Then that'll be Degumber. Since you're Peachy's pal, I'll tell you. We're gonna put the screw on the rajah for what he did to his mother-in-law."

"kIPLING:You mean you intend to blackmail him?You wouldn't get out alive! If they don't cut your throat, they'll poison you."

"Both's been tried. Peachy and me don't kill easy!"

"By telling him we're correspondents for The Northern Star."

"let me introduce you to Brother Peacy Carnehan, which is him and Brother Daniel Dravot which is I. The less said about our jobs, the better, We've been most things We.ve been all over India, We know her cities, jungles. Jails and passes. We have decided she isnt beig enough for us..The commissioner said that. We're going to another place...where a man isn;t crowded..and can come into his own. We're not little men, so we're going to be kings...Oh ,Kafisistan we hear they have two and 30 idols there,,So we'll be the 33d and the 34th..Its a place of warring tribes..meaning a landof oppurnity...In any place where they fight, a man who knows how to drill men can always be a King. We shall go to those parts and say to any King we find — "D'you want to vanquish your foes?' and we will show him how to drill men; for that we know better than anything else. Then we will subvert that King and seize his Throne and establish a Dynasty."

"That's the last of them Peachy, no more gourds to burn."

"The more tribes, the more they'll fight, and the better for us."

"[Wistfully observing dancing women] Boil'em once or twice in hot water and they'll come out like chicken and ham! You wouldn't know them from the Gaietey Chorus!"

"[Lecturing his Er-Heb recruits while Billy Fish translates:] Now listen to me, you benighted muckers! We're going to teach you soldiering, The world's noblest profession! When we're done with you, you'll be able to stand up and slaughter your foes like civilized men! But first, you will have to learn to march in step. And do the manual of arms without even having to think! Good soldiers don't think, they just obey! Do you suppose that if a man thought twice, he'd give his life for Queen and Country? Not bloody likely! He wouldn't go near the battlefield! One look at your foolish faces tells me that you're going to be crack troops. Ohhh him there with the five-and-a-half hat size has the makings of a bloody hero!"

"Michael Caine — Peachy Carnehan"

"Sean Connery — Daniel Dravot"

"Saeed Jaffrey — Billy Fish"

"Jack May — District Commisioner"

"Christopher Plummer — Rudyard Kipling"

"Shakira Caine — Roxanne"