Sherlock Holmes (2009 film)

"[First lines; surveying a ruffian guard; voiceover] Head cocked to the left. Partial deafness in ear. [Holmes slaps the guard in the left ear] First point of attack. Two: throat; paralyse vocal chords, stop scream. [Grabs the guard by the neck, stifling his vocal cords and silencing his scream] Three: got to be heavy drinker. Floating rib to the liver. [The guard gets punched in the gut] Four: finally, drag in left leg, fist to patella. [Punches and drags the left leg] Summary prognosis: conscious in ninety seconds, partial efficacy: quarter of an hour at best. Full faculty recovery: unlikely. [Back in real time, Holmes uses his coat to conceal himself in the shadows, and as the guard strolls past him, Holmes leaps out, does all of the above in a matter of seconds, and steals the guard's bowler hat and lantern, before taking off down the stairs.]"

"Always nice to see you, Watson."

"My mind rebels at stagnation. Give me problems, give me work. The sooner the better."

"[To Mrs. Hudson] Don't touch, everything is in its proper place, as per usual … [sneers] Nanny."

"[To Watson, about him incorrectly pronouncing Blackwood dead] This is a matter of professional integrity. No girl wants to marry a doctor who can't even tell if a man's dead or not."

"The game is afoot. [In unison with Watson] Follow your spirit and upon this charge – Cry, God for Harry, England and Saint George!"

"[To Irene] I was simply studying your methods … should the authorities ask me to hunt you down."

"Ah … putrefaction."

"[As he and Watson are confronted by Dredger and two smaller thugs, Dredger asks him if he has any problem] Meat … or potatoes?"

"Watson, what have you done?"

"[Wakes up naked with Adler having cuffed him spread-eagle to the bed with a pillow over his crotch. A maid comes in, sees him and shrieks] Madam, I need you to remain calm. And trust me, I'm a professional. Beneath this pillow lies the key to my release. [The maid runs out in disgust]"

"[To Blackwood] What a busy afterlife you're having."

"My journey took me somewhat further down the rabbit-hole than I'd intended and, though I dirtied my fluffy white tail, I've emerged … enlightened."

"[To Blackwood] The devil's due a soul, I'd say."

"[At the end of the movie, when Holmes deciphers the true motive of the crime] There's nothing more elusive than an obvious fact."

"[Final line] Case reopened."

"[Holmes has been firing a gun in his room when Watson opens the door] Permission to enter the armory."

"[About an empty vial, to Holmes] You do know what you're drinking is meant for eye surgery?"

"[About Irene] She was the only adversary who ever outsmarted you. Twice. Made a proper idiot out of you."

"What could she possibly need? An alibi? A beard? A human canoe. She could sit on your back and paddle you up the Thames."

"I've been going over my notes of our exploits over the past seven months. Would you like to hear my conclusions? … I am psychologically disturbed."

"[Seeing Holmes has left his revolver behind] He's left it there on purpose."

"[About Irene] She loves an entrance, your muse."

"[With a goon in a stranglehold] Relax … I'm a doctor."

"[After Holmes fires all ammo at Lord Blackwood] What was that about saving bullets?"

"[After he and Mary come upon Holmes, who appears to have hanged himself in his rooms] Don't worry, dear- suicide's not in his repertoire, he's far too fond of himself for that."

"[On several occasions] You seem surprised."

"Holmes, you must widen your gaze."

"You and I are bound together on a journey that will twist the very fabric of nature."

"Beneath your mask of logic I sense a fragility. That worries me. Steel your mind, Holmes; or by the time you realize you made all of this possible, it'll be the last sane thought in your head."

"[Before he is to be executed] Death … is only the beginning."

"[About Irene] She followed you here, Holmes! You've led your lamb to slaughter."

"London's so bleak this time of year. Not that I'm pining for New Jersey, I prefer to travel in the winter."

"I'm Irene Adler again."

"I've never been in over my head."

"[Holmes is reeling from the doctored wine she gave him] I told you to let it breathe. Can you taste the comet?"

"Mrs. Hudson: Oh, he's killed the dog … again."

"Cemetery Groundskeeper: I know what I saw! It was Blackwood. As clearly as I see you. And when the dead walk … the living will fill these coffins."

"Tanner: Oh, you've found a sense of humor, Doctor! … If only just a sense."

"Lord Coward: How terrible is wisdom, when it brings no profit to the wise."

"Mary Morstan: [to Holmes] Solve this … whatever it takes."

"Professor Moriarty: [to Adler, aboard a train] The train will depart when I tell it to. And you will leave my employment when I allow you to."

"Holmes: You have the grand gift of silence, Watson. It makes you quite invaluable as a companion."

"Watson: You're not human!"

"Holmes: The little details are by far the most important."

"Holmes: Data, data, data, I cannot make bricks without clay."

"Holmes: It is a capital mistake to theorize before one has data. Inevitably, one begins to twist facts to suit theories, instead of theories to suit facts."

"Holmes: Crime is common. Logic is rare."

"Holmes: It makes a considerable difference to me, having someone with me on whom I can thoroughly rely."

"Holmes: My mind rebels at stagnation; give me problems, give me work."