Cecil B. Demented

"We've all taken a vow of celibacy for celluloid. No one gets laid until we finish our movie. We're horny, but our film comes first."

"Blue balls for celluloid!"

"I'm a prophet against profit!"

"The slash and burn of the white-hot metal will brand you forever with the logo of Cecil B. Demented. Wear the privileged scar of cinema sainthood with pride and horniness."

"Power to the people who punish bad cinema!"

"Family is just a dirty word for censorship!"

"Hi. I played you in lots of porno movies. Some Kind of Happiness, I've already shot it. Only it's called Some Kind of Horniness."

"When I was ten years old my entire family fucked me under the Christmas tree!"

"Dear Diary, another day, and it's the same old thing. Every where I go, everything I do just seems to lead to the same dead end: my derrière."

"Porno fans! It's me, Cherish, and I need your hardcore help!"

"Satan says you need more color!"

"I mean, my father is Zozo, the three-headed guard dog at the gates of hell."

"It's goat urine!"

"Theater Marquee: Pauly Shore marathon, 4 comedy classics!!!!"

"Fidget: Hey hey MPAA, how many movies did you censor today?"

"Lyle: [running in place] Help! Cherish! I'm stuck in a K-hole and I can't get out!"

"Angry Moviegoer: I walk out of your films, on airplanes!"

"Demented forever!"

"Long live guerrilla film making!"

"Melanie Griffith - Honey Whitlock"

"Stephen Dorff - Cecil B. Demented"

"Alicia Witt - Cherish"

"Adrian Grenier - Lyle"

"Larry Gilliard Jr. - Lewis"

"Maggie Gyllenhaal - Raven"

"Jack Noseworthy - Rodney"

"Mink Stole - Mrs. Sylvia Mallory"

"Ricki Lake - Libby"

"Patricia Hearst - Fidget's Mom"