Top Secret!

"Nick, I've tried everything: the embassy, the German government, the consulate. I even talked to the U.N. ambassador. It's no use, I just can't bring my wife to orgasm."

"[on the phone] What is the condition of Sergeant Kruger? [pause] Very well, let me know if there is any change in his condition. [Hangs up] He's dead."

"Don't take it so hard Nick, life is filled with it's little miseries, each of us in his own way must learn to deal with adversity in a mature and adult fashion. [Sneezes into hands, screams and jumps out a window]"

"Go quickly. If they find out you've seen this, your life will be worth less than a truck load of dead rats in a tampon factory."

"Movie? What movie?"

"Don't tell anyone."

"From the makers of the original "Airplane!" (not the Wright brothers)"

"Val Kilmer - Nick Rivers"

"Lucy Gutteridge - Hillary Flammond"

"Christopher Villiers - Nigel "The Torch", Resistance Leader"

"Billy J. Mitchell - Martin, Nick's agent"

"Jeremy Kemp - General Streck"

"Omar Sharif - Agent Cedric"

"Peter Cushing - Bookstore Proprietor"

"Michael Gough - Dr. Paul Flammond"

"Warren Clarke - Colonel von Horst"

"Harry Ditson - Du Quois, Resistance Member"

"Jim Carter - Déjà Vu, Resistance Member"

"Eddie Tagoe - Chocolate Mousse, Resistance Member"

"John Sharp - Maitre'D"

"Ian McNeice - Blind Souvenir Vendor"

"Gertan Klauber - The Mayor"

"Richard Mayes - Vladimir Biletnikov"