Stardust Memories

"I took one course in existential philosophy at, uh, at New York University, and on, uh, on the final... they gave me ten questions, and, uh, I couldn't answer a single one of 'em. You know? I left 'em all blank... I got a hundred."

"You can't control life. It doesn't wind up perfectly. Only-only art you can control. Art and masturbation. Two areas in which I am an absolute expert."

"I don't know much about classic music. For years I thought the Goldberg Variations were something Mr. and Mrs. Goldberg tried on their wedding night."

"To you, I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the loyal opposition."

"Female fan: [to Bates] Will you autograph my left breast?"

"Woody Allen - Sandy Bates"

"Charlotte Rampling - Dorrie"

"Jessica Harper - Daisy"

"Marie-Christine Barrault - Isobel"

"Tony Roberts - Tony"