Michael Richards

"For me to be at a comedy club and flip out and say this crap, I'm deeply, deeply sorry. … I'm not a racist, that's what's so insane about this!"

"Shut up! Fifty years ago we'd have you upside-down with a fucking fork up your ass!"

"They're going to arrest me for calling a black man a nigger?"

"You can talk! You can talk! You can talk! You're brave now, motherfucker! Throw his ass out! He's a nigger! He's a nigger! He's a nigger! A nigger, look, there's a nigger! Ooh! Ooh! All right, ya see? It shocks you, it shocks you to see what's buried beneath, you stupid motherfuckers!"

"Well, you interrupted me, pal. That's what happens when you interrupt the white man, don't you know?"

"Cracker-ass? Are you calling me cracker-ass, nigga!?"

"He's a nigger! He's a nigger! He's a nigger!"

"What was uncalled for? It is uncalled for you to interrupt my ass, you cheap motherfucker! [Responding to the heckler saying "That was uncalled for!"]"

"What's the matter, too much for you to handle?""

"Ohh, I guess you got me there. He's absolutely right. I'm just a wash-up. Gotta stand on the stage. [Responding to the heckler saying "You're not funny! You're a reject! You never had no shows! You never had no movies! 'Seinfeld,' that's it!"]"

"Ohh, I guess I gotta quit because I said 'nigger.'"