Mad Buddies

"A reality show with these two idiots!! I love it!!"

"Minister, as a reality show, it is going to kick butt, I promise. And more to the point, it's going to work for essay tourism, and it's gonna work for you. Imagine how you're gonna impress the President. You'll be bringing black and white together in our rainbow nation. The most important thing they must not know is they are on television, and they must not know about the reality show."

"You are a man of vision, sir."

"Well, are our heroes just too far gone to get over their cheap racist selves, or will they kiss and make up? And if anyone comes across Beast or Boetie, please play along. Do not let them know that they are being filmed or that you know who they are. This is South Africa's own heartbeat reality show, Buddies or Broke."

"Hello, boys. I thought something like this might happen. Do you remember what I said... about the prize? And how you might just get lucky?"

"Life is so easy when you have the tools."

"Yes, everyone is talking about the madness our two heroes got up to last night on Buddies or Broke. So, by popular demand, and I mean demand, here are the highlights."

"Okay, everybody, listen up! We're changing the rules. We're only a few hours away from the end and from now on, this is a race. Two million prize, winner takes all!"

"The final leg to Johannesburg, and the finish line. Let the climax begin!!"

"Leon Schuster – Boetie"

"Kenneth Nkosi – Beast"

"Tanit Phoenix – Kelsey"

"Alfred Ntombela – Minister Nda"

"Trevor Noah – Bookie"