Chevy Chase

"[Chevy falls down, and gets up]LIVE FROM NEW YORK, IT'S SATURDAY NIGHT!"

"It was my understanding that there would be no math."

"I'm Chevy Chase - and you're not."

"I want to look him straight in the eye, and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, d!ckless, hopeless, heartless, fat- @ss, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey sh!t he is!"

"We're kicking off our own fun old fashion family Christmas by heading out into the country in the old front-wheel drive sleigh to embrace the frosty majesty of the Winter landscape and select that most important of Christmas symbols."

"Medium talent."