"Now listen to me, it's crucial that you give it the bucket. Destroying buckets is all it knows! That is its singular personality trait! Sure, I can hear you saying: "How does a character with only one personality trait deserve to join the pantheon of beloved Stanley Parable characters?" Well you see, if you were to really explore the Bucket Destroyer you'd see that its desire to crush buckets is so densely loaded with complexity and nuance that it's really like ten personality traits! What other object in this game can you even say that about? The broom closet? Certainly not. I wonder what sort of Bucket Destroyer merchandise the fans will be clamoring for after this."
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The Stanley Parable
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