210 quotes found
"Wil: [Politically correct version of 'baa, baa black sheep'] Blah, blah, blah. I hate myself Pass the weed. I have to testify in court."
"Dave: [In response to an American panellist saying, "If [Australians] don't vote, you get fined."] Yeah, and if you don't vote you get George Bush!"
""Two Australians Kidnapped in Iraq: Unfortunately not Will Anderson" (September 17, 2004)"
""Will Anderson to write and star in a comedy show with Rove: Australian comedy dies" (September 25, 2004)"
""Dicko boycotts ARIAs: No one gives a shit" (September 25, 2004)"
"The Glass House finally removed from detention centres: refugees happy, now think that torture is over."
"Pope ponders evolution: Hmmm, no."
"George Bush discovers Bird Flu: Decides to invade Turkey"
"Osama Bin Ladin hiding in hole: Not sure how he got to Tasmania"
"Mr. Robert: And remember, this is a game in direct competition with the worst kind of competition a game can possibly have: itself in the past."
"Mr. Robert: Never has a camera felt so obvious - it's as if this game has been shot by some director who likes using cameras built for people with giant hands made of ham."
"Mr. Robert: For every 3D update that gets its wings, a 2D classic dies."
"Legend:Do you play XBox Live at all? Interviewee: No Legend (to the camera): No, he doesn't XBox live- Interviewee (interrupting): My living room isn't big enough to have an XBox in it."
"Legend: Sega or Nintendo? Interviewee: Sega, definitely. Legend: PlayStation or XBox? Interviewee: PlayStation. Legend: Pussy or Ass? Interviewee: Ass. Legend: Ass...that's my kinda guy."
"Mr. Ryan: The fact is the most dangerous foe you're up against in this game are those invincible invisible giant bugs that conspire to ruin the gaming experience, by trapping your leg in a mountain or throwing you outta a room through a wall and into a black expanse of nothingness, or my particular favourite - deviously intercepting your saved game and scrubbing it from the hard drive and not even having the decency to scream I LIKE IT! in your face."
"Legend (to Female Interviewee): Are you old enough to wear makeup? Female Interviewee: Yes, I'm 16. Male Interviewee (to Legend): How old do you have to be to wear makeup, brother? Legend (to Male Interviewee): I dunno, how old were you when you started?"
"Legend (to Male Interviewee 2, who is dressed in a pink lycra top and wearing pigtails): What's your name? Male Interviewee 2: William. Legend: And do you play video games? It looks as though you do, son. You gotta play some kinda games."
"Mr. Robert: The magic of a show like Consolevania is that it's for people who already know their stuff. So, you don't need us to tell you that Siren comes from the mind of the fellas behind Silent Hill. You don't need us to tell you that it's already garnered a solid reputation, with import forums ablaze with details of it's tense set pieces. You don't need us to tell you that it's a game about ten people trying to survive in a village overrun by people tainted by a stream that now runs blood red. But you see we've told you anyway in a round-about way that makes you feel clever - see how that works?"
"Mr. Robert: Siren makes fun sound look like a dirty word, like the way beef sounds like a dirty word on Saturday night."
"Commentator: Kawada struggling to lift for the German suplex! Looked like me trying to lift Giant Baba's daughter into bed. She's giant in all the right places."
"Mr. Robert: There's no need for me to go long-winded here and keep you hanging for what I think of this game because I wanna shout it from the rooftops like a lesbian."
"Legend: What's your highscore on Radiant Silvergun? Interviewee: errr...I've never played it Legend: You've never played Radiant Silvergun? I can't believe that. What do you think of the control system in Gigantic Drive on the PS2?"
"Interviewee 2: What else do you do in Milwaukee apart from play XBox? Legend: We play games and errr...I like hunting. Interviewee 2: Hunting? Legend: Yeah. Interviewee 2: What do you hunt? Legend: Deer. Interviewee 2: Do you kill them? Legend: I shoot them. Interviewee 2: Well, that's not very nice."
"Legend (to Interviewee): You don't look like a games player, you look like you got a masturbater's hands."
"Mr. Robert: If there's one thing I can't stand it's spoilers. You know, like when someone told you that Cloud has sex with Sephiroth at the end of Final Fantasy VII."
"Mr. Robert: It's the perfect game to play at the beach - if you have a long enough extension cord and you manage to get your wide-screen telly on the plane."
"Mr. Ryan: Is it in any way right or fair to compare a 3D platformer with the 2D elite? No, you're fucking right it isn't. And watch your language - my parents are watching this."
"Legend: Talk to me about [DoDonpachi] Interviewee 1: *laughs* Legend: Talk to me about DoDonpachi, c'mon! Interviewee 1: Who's he.. Legend: What's your best score on DoDonpachi? Interviewee 1: What is that? Pacman? Legend: Yeah, pretty much Pacman, yeah."
"Legend: I want you to go home, you turn on Ridge Racer, you get your Time Attack on and you come back and you tell me what your best Time Attack time is! Interviewee 1: Will you tell me where my pals are? Legend: Your pals are gone! This is what this has all been, it's a ruse. My friends come up in a van and pull your friends inside! We take them off the road - we go huntin' with them."
"Legend: Ridge Racer - what's your best Time Attack time? Interviewee 2: What's my what? Legend: Your best Time Attack time in Ridge Racer? Interviewee 2: What's a Tommatic Tonne?"
"Hitler: That's what I excpect from those shysters. Go in there as a good fee-paying customer, get treated like a war criminal."
"Mr. Robert: There's near-view puzzles to solve, but since Resident Evil's puzzles are about as appealing as an old-age pensioner covering her fanny with a crossword book, we're not gonna worry too much about that."
"Mr. Robert: You have a choice of eight character so there's every chance you'll find one that appeals to you, or at least looks like you. That's why I've chosen Jim, 'cause I'm black with blond hair and I'm a postman."
"Interviewee: You from New York? Legend: I'm from Milwaukee. Interviewee: Milwaukee? Legend: Yeah...where are you from? Interviewee: I'm from Canada. Legend: You're not from Canada - I heard you talkin' over there. Interviewee: What did I sound like? Legend: I dunno."
"Mr. Robert: When you've spent hours upon hours training up your special attacks in the barracks in town or spent days tracking some lone warrior across the land, inviting him to banquets and buying him gifts just so he'll join your army, the battle mode takes on great importance. When that same warrior leads your troops into a trap and suffers confusion for the entire battle you feel that way you felt when you took that bird to the pictures and McDonalds and didn't even get your boabie tickled."
"Mr. Robert: If you'll let me put my wank hat on for a moment..."
"Mr. Ryan: ...and I'm using the inverted commas motion with my fingers here folks when I say "story"..."
"(Woman jumps around behind the interviewees trying to get noticed) Legend: If you're gonna do that at least show your breasts, please. That's not good enough."
"Mr. Robert: Syberia II thankfully doesn't expect you to solve many problems of the bizarrely illogical 'combine-plastic-cactus-with-baby's-nappy variety."
"Mr. Ryan: This game is fucking rubbish. Absolutely terrible."
"Mr. Ryan: I haven't seen this much fucking pop-up since bedtime when I was three."
"Mr. Robert: This is the third Legends of Wrestling game. It's a series that has been getting progressively better. So we positive minded people at Consolevania are gonna cut it a lot of slack. A lot of slack. We're talking Briana Banks' arse kinda slack."
"Mr Robert: Nostalgia is a powerful thing. We know this from the amount of people that claim that Transformers are good."
"Mr. Ryan: If this game is to be believed then the US Army apparently only have one tactic."
"End of Level Boss: You will always make dinner! Why? Because you have inferior attack pattern."
"End of Level Boss: Time means nothing when you have superior attack patterns! Now phone me a pizza! Is it there yet?"
"Mr. Robert: The game's so good they should have named it twice."
"John Gacy: Hi folks. My name's John Gacy, that's right the serial kil- games reviewer."
"John Gacy: Shut up will ya! I told you I let you out, when Duke Nukem Forever comes out!"
"Molyneux: You know, the problem with you boys...you're bored with excitement, whereas my games - they surely show you how to be excited by boredom."
"Legend: Big game coming out soon, it's called Bang Bus: The videogame. Are you gonna be buying that game? Very controversial."
"Mr Robert: And what happens when you put too many cherries on a cake? The cake suffers from fuckin' slowdown... Okay,maybe the cake analogy isn't really workin' very well, but you see what I mean."
"Mr Ryan: Christ, it's been four episodes in and I'm beginning to sound like I don't actually like games but I do though, honest, honest I do"
"Kenny: Ye no gonna thank me fur yer present, ya fat poofs?"
"John Gacy: I'm John Gacy- I'm Santa Claus. Your favourite serial kille- your favourite games reviewe- your favourite benevolent old man who delivers gifts at Christmas."
"John Gacy: I gotta give that entire experience... ten outta ten."
"Mr. Ryan: Never more so than during one of the very, very few fight scenes do you feel like you're playing a game that's being held together by nothing more than the sheer willpower of the programmers."
"Evenin' folks!"
"It's fun, fun, fun, fun, fun all the way campers!"
"They've only came in for a warm."
"Times are hard and friends are few. (usually to competition winners)"
"If I wanted your opinion, I'd slap it outta ya."
"Believe you, me."
"Oh puh-lease."
"Spend it on yourself."
"Oooh, what? Fabulous!"
"Bert, get your finger out your nose and play the V"
"Live at 5 on 4"
"C'mon Bust, do yer trick!"
"Roll the clip, Bert!"
"put DVD name here> is out now on DVDVDVD."
"Ooooh, by 'eck Lover Dover Clover!"
"It's time for me to get busy on my organ as we play the 'two thousand pound organ game'. Are you ready? 1, 2, 3.."
"Keep up or I get ratty."
"So what more d'ya want?"
"Let me 'ear ya"
"I think it's time for my medication!"
"It's the medication!"
"It's the pills!"
"Don't jump Buster!" (when on edge of desk)"
"Buster, go and play in the Blue Peter garden, but don't dig Shep up."
"On tonight's show it's the one and only..."
"Imagine if an American tourist in a hotel room tuned in now..."
"Oh look it's Windy Miller waving his arm about."
"In a minute Buster is going to jump off here and drag a pensioner around the studio by the hem of her mac."
"I will definitely come and see you in. (insert musical/play name here)"
"It was a great read."
"I'm not gonna do the rules today cos I can't be bothered."
"Riff Raff. (referring the audience)"
"Behave or I'll chuck / throw / sling me tea over you" (to audience)"
"Raise the roof for (guest name)"
"Oh come on Buster, we're leaving!"
"Now don't go and send me in (random food product Paul mentions he likes)"
"Some of us are born on the sunny side of the bed, some of us on the dark side. ~ On the Paul O’Grady Show, Channel 4 television, 7th Oct. 2009"
"Ron Josol: So she tells me to do something. Oh, I will! But you have security! (on "Do Somethin'" by Britney Spears)"
"Alex Nussbaum: Britney, before you open the door, make sure you know who it is. It just could be a stalker. (on "Lucky" by Britney Spears)"
"Debra DiGiovanni: [Referring to the slow placed scene of dialogue at the video beginning] Wake me up when the video starts. (on "Wake Me Up When September Ends" by Green Day)"
"Fraser Young: Whoa, wait. Since when are there 4 guys in Green Day? (on "Wake Me Up When September Ends" by Green Day)"
"Nikki Payne: Here they are, The Fake Click Five! (on "Catch Your Wave" by The Click Five)"
"David Kerr: If you're still playing with dolls, you're too young for fake breasts. (on "Stupid Girls" by Pink)"
"David Kerr: Look out, Dr. Phil. There is a new caring man out there and his name is Marshall Mathers. (on "Stan" by Eminem featuring Dido)"
"David Kerr: Why is it that Stan's inner voice sounds just like Eminem? (on "Stan" by Eminem featuring Dido)"
"Alex Nussbaum: Look at his name. "Stan" written in capital letters, with not just one but two exclamation marks, just in case you didn't know he was an intense guy. Stan! (on "Stan" by Eminem featuring Dido)"
"David Kerr: If you wash your hands in your pee, then it saves you a bunch of time. (on "Dirty Little Secret" by The All-American Rejects)"
"Barry Taylor: It isn't your skin color that makes you ugly, it's your face. (on "Dirty Little Secret" by The All-American Rejects)"
"Alex Nussbaum: When you eat you feel like a failure? Funny, 'cause when I eat I feel like a beverage. (on "Dirty Little Secret" by The All-American Rejects)"
"David Kerr: I thought it was pretty funny until I recognized my mom's writing, though I'm not sure why she drew me in a dress. (on "Dirty Little Secret" by The All-American Rejects)"
"David Kerr: Here's an idea, why don't you keep your crappy music your dirty little secret, and spare us from listening to it. (on "Dirty Little Secret" by The All-American Rejects)"
"Nicole Arbour: When I see the lights, it makes me go boom boom boom shboom boom boom boom b-boom, spandex! (on "Sorry" by Madonna)"
"Steven Shehori: Whoa, looks like Madonna isn't choosy about the men she picks. But enough about Guy Ritchie. (on "Sorry" by Madonna)"
"DJ Trixx: I'm sorry, but Justin Timberlake makes this song so fruity. (on "Signs" by Snoop Dogg featuring Justin Timberlake and Charlie Wilson)"
"Steven Shehori: [In the music video, Madonna dances in a MMA cage] We now observe Madonna in her natural habitat. (on "Sorry" by Madonna)"
"Ron Sparks: Thank God it's not the G-Unit remix...What?...It is the G-Unit remix? G-G-G-G-G-Unit! (on "I Know You Don't Love Me" by Tony Yayo featuring G-Unit)"
"Roddy Colmer: You're fired. You're fired. You're so fired. You're gay. You're fired. (on "Walk Away" by Kelly Clarkson)"
"Trevor Boris: Hey, kids! This is how baby cars are made. You take a daddy car and the daddy car puts his engine in the mommy car's trunk. (on "Go with the Flow" by Queens of the Stone Age)"
"Tamla Mai-Deleon: I give it a...purple. (on "I Write Sins Not Tragedies" by Panic! at the Disco)"
"Will Weldon: So finally, the brunette one gets a chance to sing. (on "Beep" by the Pussycat Dolls featuring will.i.am)"
"Linda Dano (speaking in the music video): He is 25 years old, and she is 84 years old."
"Sabrina Jalees: Please welcome Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher! (on "The Hardest Part" by Coldplay)"
"Pink (music video lyrics): My parents hated me, my teachers dated me."
"Ron Josol: Oh, the cat is out of the bag! You were one of those girls?! (on "Don't Let Me Get Me" by Pink)"
"Matt Alden: I'm not sure, but I think Shaggy just recited the alphabet backwards somewhere in there. (on "It Wasn't Me" by Shaggy featuring Rikrok)"
"Dini Dimakos: Yeah, you'll talk to this basket case, but when there's a hot guy you'll be like, "Oh, no, I can't talk, I'm all shy and nervous!" (on "Unwritten" by Natasha Bedingfield)"
"Fraser Young: Hey! Let's play Skeeball! I wanna win a clean needle! (on "Who Knew" by Pink"
"Trevor Boris: "Who knew" that this would be such a crappy video. I had a feeling. (on "Who Knew" by Pink"
"Fraser Young: Don't ever chain up the fatties. (on "The Yeah Yeah Yeah Song" by The Flaming Lips"
"Alex Nussbaum: Zeus shows him a yellow paper. Is it that he needs help reading it, or is he challenging Chamillionaire to see if he can read? (on "Ridin'" by Chamillionaire featuring Krazyie Bone)"
"Trevor Boris: When people see this video, he'll be lucky if he's a chethousandaire. (on "Ridin'" by Chamillionaire featuring Krayzie Bone)"
"Fraser Young: That's my parents arguing over whose fault it is that they forgot my 9th birthday. (on "Crazy" by Gnarls Barkley)"
"Sabrina Jalees: Shakira, honey, we know. That's why you have a choreographer. (on "Hips Don't Lie" by Shakira featuring Wyclef Jean)"
"Chris Jericho: Is the little girl gonna get shot in the face?! (on "Freak on a Leash" by Korn)"
"Sabrina Jalees: Damn you gender rolls! I want a cheesecake! (on "Tribute" by Tenacious D)"
"Ali Rizvi: So if Satan plays a guitar, what does Jesus play? Like...a flute or something? (on "Tribute" by Tenacious D)"
"Nile Seguin: Hey, I just made up with my wife. Great...now you're my wife. (on "But It's Better If You Do" by Panic! at the Disco)"
"Dini Dimakos: For a virgin, Jon's pretty flexible....wanna go out some time? (on "S Club Party" by S Club 7)"
"Dini Dimakos: I give this video 4 S Cluuuuuuuuuuuuuubs out of 5 S Cluuuuuuuuuuuuuuuubs! (on "S Club Party" by S Club 7)"
"Todd Shapiro: If you kiss yourself, are you gay? (on "The Kill" by 30 Seconds to Mars)"
"Anna Von Frances: If you are truly beautiful you can cut off all your hair and still look pretty. That is why Jennifer Aniston will always have long hair. (on "Papa Don't Preach" by Madonna)"
"Robin Black: I wanna be so famous, my vagina can travel through time. (on "A Public Affair" by Jessica Simpson)"
"Darrin Rows: There are no mother****ing snakes on a mother****ing plane? This is like a porno that ends when a girl takes her shirt off. (on "Bring It (Snakes on a Plane)" by Cobra Starship featuring William Beckett, Travis McCoy, and Maja Ivarsson)"
"Dini Dimakos: Animal cruelty: dying a dog's fur purple. Human cruelty: making a human's hair look like a poodle. (on "Morris Brown" by Outkast featuring Scar and Sleepy Brown)"
"Laurie Elliott: You're not here for our entertainment? Oh, why would you be, you're just an entertainer... (on "U + Ur Hand" by Pink)"
"Ron Sparks: What does the "O" stand for Steve? "Oh my goodness he's got no talent at all!" (on "Joker & the Thief" by Wolfmother)"
"Hugh Phukovsky: I don't need to listen to a robot talk about love. Robots don't know anything about love. Love comes from here. The human heart...of a 50-year old Jewish man. (on "Too Little Too Late" by JoJo)"
"Ron Sparks: You know what I like about this video... Nothing. (on "Money Maker" by Ludacris featuring Pharrell)"
"Fraser Young: You gotta understand, this was made in 1984. They didn't even have pencils back then! They just had to throw dirty rocks at a piece of paper and hope it makes a picture. (on "Take on Me" by a-ha)"
"Measha Brueggergosman: Going to the closet...what's happening in the closet...he's going over to the closet! (on "Trapped in the Closet Pt. 1" by R. Kelly)"
"Ron Sparks: If I tried to put my thumbs down any further, I would mess my pants. And then my pants would be full of Hinder. (on "Lips of an Angel" by Hinder)"
"Pete Zedlacher: (blowing a raspberry) (on "Lips of an Angel" by Hinder; that was cut in and out between other jurors' verdicts)"
"Boomer Phillips: I could kick Tinkerbell in the face... and not feel bad. And I'm a guy who loves dogs. Just... Kick it in the face!! (on Paris Hilton's chihuahua Tinkerbell in "Nothing in This World" by Paris Hilton)"
"Trevor Boris: All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth, made out of diamonds, bitches! (on "Chain Hang Low" by Jibbs)"
"Trevor Boris: "I'm madly in anger with you"? Okay, that is officially the gayest line in all of heavy metal. (on "St. Anger" by Metallica)"
""Weird Al" Yankovic: If your song's title is so long that it can't fit on a bumper sticker, you might just be a pretentious alternative rock band! (on "Lying Is the Most Fun a Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off" by Panic! at the Disco)"
"Nikki Payne: Ooh you naughty cake I’m gonna wrestle in some cake to make me sure if it doesn’t hurt your children. (on "Fergalicious" by Fergie featuring will.i.am)"
"Dini Dimakos: There are two places where Fergie doesn't charge for admission: Fergieland and between her legs. Coincidentally, they are the same place. (on "Fergalicious" by Fergie featuring will.i.am)"
"Trevor Boris: This video is sh-, this video is sh-, this video is sh-, shit shit shit shit! (on "Fergalicious" by Fergie featuring will.i.am)"
"Nikki Payne: I don't like chairs! Take that chair! Fuck you chair! (on "So Excited" by Janet Jackson featuring Khia)"
"Alex Nussbaum: Everybody, run! It's a Sisquake! (on "Thong Song" by Sisqo)"
"Ron Sparks: Hey, some weird guy in a trenchcoat just followed a half-black, half-white woman up my staircase. Get over here! (on "Billie Jean" by Michael Jackson)"
"Dini Dimakos: Sorry poor orphan children, what Beyonce wants, Beyonce gets. (on "8 Days of Christmas" by Destiny's Child)"
"Dini Dimakos: "Yo B I'm still pimping, and spending cheese on all these women, I wish you was Rihanna, cuz then I'd be up on ya." (on "Eight Days of Christmas" by Destiny's Child)"
"Boomer Philips: Who taught this guy to drive, Dany Heatley? (on "Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays" by *NSYNC)"
"Trevor Boris: All I want for Christmas is to go home. Seriously. I've been locked in here since the very first episode! (on "All I Want for Christmas" by Mariah Carey)"
"Trevor Boris: Brooke Hogan is like Paris Hilton, without the talent. I know. (on "About Us" by Brooke Hogan featuring Paul Wall)"
"Nicole Arbour: Wow, the Harajuku Girls are like, stealth, they can climb walls like fricken Batman. (on "The Sweet Escape" by Gwen Stefani featuring Akon)"
"Ron Sparks: So you go driving around in your parents car, without a license, and you pick up some run-away, and she's underaged, and you go to jail, and then they have to come back early to bail you out? Yeah, parents just don't understand. What is with parents!? (on "Parents Just Don't Understand" by DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince)"
"Fraser Young: Look! That wind is so strong! It's not a scene OR an arms race, it's a fucking hurricane! (on "This Ain't a Scene, It's an Arms Race" by Fall Out Boy)"
"Fraser Young: Hey, you kissed my friend, I'm gonna run you off the road, we'll call it even. (on "What Goes Around...Comes Around by Justin Timberlake)"
"Nicole Arbour: Just when I thought she couldn't copy Gwen anymore, she went and got black Harajuku girls. (on "Glamorous" by Fergie featuring Ludacris)"
"Andrew Johnston: "Why don't you like me?" I'll tell you why I don't like you, Mika, because you say "like" like you're licking something. Presumably...some dude's ballsack. High five! (on "Grace Kelly" by Mika)"
"Darrin Rose: This video made me want to kill myself, even more than the Marilyn Manson video, which really made me want to kill myself. So this episode of Video on Trial could end with a double suicide, in which I kill myself twice, which is mathematically impossible. (on "I Don't Love You" by My Chemical Romance)"
"Ron Sparks: Dude, these space people came billions of miles just to meet you. I really think they'll be willing to walk across your room. You're gonna have to run further than that. (on "Tainted Love" by Soft Cell)"
"DJ Trixx: Busting makes me feel good? Busting makes ALL guys feel good, you dork. (on "Ghostbusters" by Ray Parker, Jr.)"
"Jemeni: Yay, a song about illegal substances! (on "Alfie" by Lily Allen)"
"Nicole Arbour: Oh, cool, he and I have something in common: we both love mirrors. Hi, self! (on "The Bird and the Worm" by The Used)"
"Trevor Boris: So this video is about a bird and a worm. Ooh, interesting! (on "The Bird and the Worm" by The Used)"
"Darrin Rows: Move over, pope! DJ Khaled is taking over! (on "We Takin' Over" by DJ Khaled featuring Akon, T.I., Rick Ross, Fat Joe, Birdman, and Lil Wayne)"
"Nicole Arbour: Hey, I just got a text message from Trevor! "Put your tits away, whore!" (on "Never Again" by Kelly Clarkson)"
"Dini Dimakos: He looks like the love child of Jake Gyllenhaal and Jared Leto. (on "Pretty Handsome Awkward by The Used)"
"Dini Dimakos:The next time some guy grabs my ass on the street, I'll be like (mimics projectile vomiting) How do you like that?! (on "Pretty Handsome Awkward by The Used)"
"Trevor Boris: Fuck Disneyand, I wanna go to Mexico for the gay zebras! (on Icky Thump" by The White Stripes)"
"Soulja Boy: (music video dialogue:Who's Soulja Boy?!)"
"Ward Anderson: Only the greatest guy in the world! ( on Crank That (Soulja Boy) by Soulja Boy)"
"Ward Anderson: YOU! ( on Crank That (Soulja Boy) by Soulja Boy)"
"Debra DiGiovanni: Sounds like a disease, i'm going to bed. ( on Hero/Heroine by Boys Like Girls)"
"Andrew Johnston: You lied to me... you told me you were a chick. Oh my god, she is such a tranny. (on "Wake Up Call" by Maroon 5)"
"Josh Ramsay: Twenty bucks says ten years from now, Britney Spears is trying to sleep with her kids' friends. She's fifty pounds overweight and she's going, "YOU WANNA PIECE OF ME?!" (on "Piece of Me" by Britney Spears)"
"Josh Ramsay: I wonder if the story is, like, one of those lost in translation things... It makes sense in Swedish, but in English, it's a little like when you're going around Ikea and you're like, "Oh, I want to have this chair, but its name is 'Svinlodenlinlin.'" (on "Tick Tick Boom" by The Hives)"
"Dini Dimakos:Ah, little Heidi, are you all tired from memorizing the lines for your reality show? (on Higher by Heidi Montag)"
"Ron Sparks: He says he's always there. He is always there. Coming over the same hill. (on "I'm Always Here" by Jimi Jamison)"
"Andrew Johnston: Sexiest bitch in this video, right there. That 70-year old woman and her dog. (on "We Like to Party" by Vengaboys)"
"Ron Sparks: This funeral is being preceeded over by Gandalf! The wise! (on "Stop and Stare" by OneRepublic)"
"Laurie Elliott: I just realized if Timbaland married Justin, he would be Timbaland Timberlake! (on "4 Minutes" by Madonna featuring Justin Timberlake and Timbaland)"
"Sabrina Jalees: So when the song ends, the girl starts clapping like; "I guess it wasn't totally crap". (On "Here (In Your Arms)" by Hellogoodbye)"
"Debra DiGiovanni: Let me guess, this is the parking lot of Robin's condo isn't it? (on "Stupid Shit" by Girlicious)"
"Debra DiGiovanni: Someone clearly did not get hugs when they were kids. (on "Psychosocial" by Slipknot)"
"Trevor Boris: Who's Kevin Rudolf? (on "Let It Rock" by Kevin Rudolf feat Lil Wayne)"
"Debra DiGiovanni: Having blue hair was a bad idea (on " Keeps Gettin' Better" by Christina Aguilera)"
"Boomer Phillips: You can just tell Beyonce passed on this one. 'Give it to Slango or whatever the hell my sister's name is.' (on "Sandcastle Disco" by Solange Knowles)"
"Dini Dimakos: She dresses like what our grandparents thought hookers in the future would dress like. (on "Poker Face" by Lady Gaga)"
"Boomer Phillips: Dude, I've been worried sick! (on "We Made You" by Eminem)"
"Sara Hennessey: Aw yes, my beauty pageant days, what was my special talent? taking a proud dump in front of everybody on center stage, my gift is my curse what can I say? (on "Heart Heart Heartbreak" by Boys Like Girls)"
"Trixx: Itching powder? does that even exist? (on "Heart Heart Heartbreak" by Boys Like Girls)"
"Darrin Rose: You know?, I feel when you desired to win a beauty contest is really out of control when we graduate from harmless pranks to murder! (on "Heart Heart Heartbreak" by Boys Like Girls)"
"Debra DiGiovanni: Now I will tell you off the top, that is not how you spell champagne. I am pretty sure there's a 'g' in it. (on "Shampain" by Marina and the Diamonds)"
"Hunter Collins: Now this how you throw a bar mitzvah. Man, my bar mitzvah was the worst. Everyone was just yelling at me, like, "You didn't learn the Scriptures! Why are you wearing a Pittsburgh Penguins jersey? You're 25! You aren't even Jewish!", and I was like, "Just give me your money and presents already." (on "I Can't Dance" by Dirt Nasty featuring LMFAO)"
"Trevor Boris: Oh, this is good to know. So now, if you're ever attacked by unicorns...which don't exist...just shoot them with rainbows...which isn't possible. (on "Blow" by Kesha)"
"Boomer Phillips: This is damn double-standard bullshit at its best. If this was the guy pushing the girl out of the car because she had a head wound, never be aired! But if it's the girl pushing the guy out, totally fine! (on "Rill Rill" by Sleigh Bells)"
"Julia Hladkowicz: This video makes me want to take away my own women's right to vote. (on "Big Banana" by Havana Brown)"
"Sabrina Jalees: I can just imagine the meeting Havana has with the record producers. They were probably like; "Okay, Havana what do you want to do a song about today? (Dumb voice) Banana... (Normal voice) Just bananas? (Dumb voice) Actually, big bananas. (on "Big Banana" by Havana Brown)"