68 quotes found
"And it's the same when there's a war on: it's the men who go to fight Women and children are civilians, when they're killed it's not right Men kill men in uniform, its the way war goes When they run they're cowards, when they stay they are heroes."
"Hello, my name is Zach Galifianakis, and I hope I'm pronouncing that right."
"I was named after my grandad. Yes, my name is Zach Grandad Galifianakis."
"If you love Barry Manilow, you're gonna love the Insane Clown Posse. Love 'em. They're exactly... well, they're not EXACTLY alike, but they're a little bit alike..."
"Seriously!, this is a DVD! I need dinosaurs, thunder, race wars, something! Dammit, I gotta sell this motherfucker.... 36.63."
"I want to combine the NAACP with Mothers Against Drunk Driving. It's called Mothers Against the Advancement of Colored People."
"I failed kindergarten because I couldn't spell my last name."
"Growing up my dad was like "Zach, you have a great last name: Galifianakis... Galifianakis... Begins with a 'gal', ends with a 'kiss'"... I'm like "That's great, Dad. Can we get it changed to 'Galifiana-fuck' please?""
"When I was a kid, I had dyslexia. And I would write about it in my dairy."
"When you look like I do, it's hard to get a table for one at Chuck E Cheese."
"Whenever I'm with a woman I whisper softly into her ear, "Will you touch my vagina...?" and she's like, "What!?" and I'm like, "That's what you're supposed to say.""
"Did you ever wake up with an erection...and then you realize you're just in a massage chair at Brookstone? And you yell to the sales clerk "I'll take it!""
"At what age do you think it's appropriate to tell a highway it's adopted?"
"I think those neighborhood signs that say 'slow children playing' are so very mean."
"My girlfriend looks a little like Charlize Theron...and a lot like Patrick Ewing."
"I dream of moving to India, or Pakistan, and becoming a cabdriver."
"I'm going to do all new, fresh material...you guys been keeping up with this O.J. thing?"
"I call my balls the bush twins."
"I dream of starting a three-man country trio called the Chixie Dicks."
"This is my impression of a Southern woman. "Tsk, I am so mad at the Taliban right now!""
"That was some really great "fatcting"."
"The only good time to say I have diarrhea is during a game of Scrabble, because it's worth a shitload of points."
"The Forgetful Vegan: Man that sure was some good pepperoni pi-Oh Fuck!"
"For 8 years now I've been addicted to cold turkey. When I tell people I'm quitting cold turkey, they say,"What are you quitting?", I'm fucking quitting cold turkey."
"You shaved your head for V For Vendetta. Did you also shave your V for Vagina? (to Natalie Portman)."
"The only time it's ok to yell out 'I have diarrhea' is when you're playing Scrabble...because it's worth a shitload of points."
"I wear a lot of Axe body spray, but I live in a black neighborhood. Over there, they call it Ask body spray. If you don't get that joke, then you're not racist."
"I once played charades with a couple that was deaf.....they were amazing. I mean, none of this sounds like business."
"I like to stump Google. The other day I Google'd "how many Mexicans live in North Korea"....Google didn't know. I also Google'd "how many candles does Dave Navarro own?"...14,000."
"Sometimes I order a beet salad, so when the waiter comes and lays down my salad I can say "thanks for laying down those funky beets". It's an expensive joke because I don't even like beets."
"Here's something you'll never see in Braille: "If you see something, say something"."
""I think I've broken three (tha-ree) cameras today!" —Rolling Stone photo shoot"
""I'm being trained to shake the bon-bon appropriately.." —'Access Hollywood interview about his JukeBox Tour"
""Clive [Davis] tried to tell me that saying certain words in a song- or as he says, ‘putting some balls into it'- isn't bad, it's just strong emotion. Well, there are certain words and emotions I don't want kids hearing, and I'm not changing because they think it's going to sell better. This is going to sound horrible, but I got 12 million votes doing what I did." —'Time, 10/5/03 - describing pressure he got from RCA to "edge-up" his songs to boost sales."
""I know this is going to sound cheesy and like I'm trying to be Miss America, but the most important responsibility a celebrity has is to set an example and be a role model. I want to make sure that no matter how long I go through this, I don't fall into the trap of changing and modifying how I do things that aren't a positive example. I want to remain somebody that the entire family can listen to or watch." —'Reuters, February 22, 2004."
""In my ideal world, no child would suffer. Charitable instincts would prevail. There would be global acceptance of all different types of people." —Learning To Sing, Page 240"
""Service, and the learning that goes with it, fosters citizenship, knowledge, and personal development in everyone, young and old, with disabilities and without. Our partnership with Youth Service America will bring awareness to the fact that youth with disabilities are great assets and can serve as volunteers too." —U.S. Newswire"
"UNICEF does amazing work. I thought I was a worldly person, and then I started working with them and realized I don’t know as much of my world as I need to. And if I don’t know as much about my world as I need to, then many, many, many people don’t. So I’m thrilled to be in a position to be able to talk about it. And so I’m gonna. —'FLY (online) magazine, November, 2005 issue"
"I think there is a predisposition among Christians that Hollywood is anti-Jesus or anti-Christianity. I was warned I'd have to fight to maintain the freedom to express my beliefs. It's an unfair stereotype, and so far that's been the farthest from the truth. While everyone I work with may not share my beliefs, I have been surrounded by nothing but support." —Clay Aiken - Today's Christian Magazine"
"In the last ten years, as editor in chief of Today's Caregiver Magazine, I have interviewed many people who are living in the public eye, all of them having something of importance to say to family caregivers. Most times they've become caregivers after becoming famous, usually due to themselves or a family member taking ill. Our keynote speaker today is unique in that he is a professionally trained caregiver before he became known to all of us. And through the unbelievable constraints that have been placed on his time, he's never lost sight of his goal of becoming a teacher and helping children living with developmental disabilities. Only his classroom has become a whole lot larger than he ever expected."
"One other positive effect of his personal dedication is that as he increases the awareness of children with developmental disabilities and their need for inclusion, he's also created a dedicated and knowledgeable group of child advocates, also known as his fans. I've spoken with many of Clay's fans here, at the Hawaiian Voices for Change Gala, online and through our support of the Florida Voices for Change Gala, and I've got to tell you, they've become true ambassadors for inclusion, driven and knowledgeable in all aspects of inclusion. The bell has rung and Mr. Aiken's classroom is now truly in session across the world."
"It's also our true privilege to present the Robert M. Barg Memorial Achievement Award to Clay. This award is very special to our hearts as it is named after the kindest man that we have ever met, our dad. It's rarely given and only presented to those who share that special brand of kindness and who work hard to truly make a difference in the lives of those in need. Ladies and gentlemen, may I present Mr. Clay Aiken."
"To be fair to all, nobody from the show can tell a finalist whether a song choice is good or bad, no matter how much they want to know. Byrd remembers Clay Aiken: He'd say, 'Byrd, if this is a great song choice, blink your left eye."
"When I review the tape [of the show] the next day, there's lots of screaming and crying,..."hen I recover the same way I do anytime I'm injured: ice, elevation and my Clay Aiken CD."
"What a dear young man.It was like watching magic. Absolute pure song. The boy stopped being there and there was nothing but singing. It was like watching magic...this young man unzipped himself and emerged like a butterfly.He did it so naturally and so beautifully that I think all of our jaws dropped and we thought "wow." Clay Aiken. What a great kid."
"I always like the idea that you can turn on the radio and say, 'Oh, that's Clay Aiken. Oh, that's Barbra Streisand. Oh, that's Frank Sinatra, Oh, that's Tony Bennett.' They're a star if you can identify them immediately by their sound. That kid has his own sound. He's got energy. He's got soul. He's got it all. That voice pours out of him."
"We have someone here today, from the smash hit show American Idol, we're thrilled to have him joining us today, because when it was made known that he would appear on this Telethon, the emails and the fan clubs that this young man has have sent us $30,000.00 just at the fact that he was here."
"And I can honestly say I have never, in all of my life, seen a theatrical groundswell that this kid has motivated, that it makes us all come right back to the bobby sox and Frank. And isn't it nice to live through that magnificence again? Here is Clay Aiken"
"Clay, you sing like Andre Agassi plays tennis, perfection, perfection. And I would kill to write and produce your first CD.""
""And Clay, I want to say something to you. I think you are one of the few people I've met throughout this competition who can take criticism like a grown up. Learn, You definitely got better, You've lost some of this facial thing which I think was distracting, and You just did a really grown up, fantastic performance. Congratulation." - Simon Cowell on "Solitaire" -"
""Clay I think, without a doubt, this performance, that song, is the best performance of the entire competition that I've ever known. Unbelievable, unbelievable. - Paula Abdul on "Unchained Melody" -"
""Clay, I think this is the third pop idol, or American idol have done, if you include the english one. Probably one of the best performance I've ever heard through the entire competition. - Simon Cowell on "To Love Somebody" -"
"I know exactly what it takes to beat this man, but people say, 'Well, Ray, two years of inactivity, you'll be rusty.' No, no. He will eliminate the rust because he is what I want and I am what he wants. And boxing needs that kind of fight."
"Tommy Hearns seemed like an indestructible machine, so to beat him, I think that was my defining moment, the pinnacle."
"I tried the gloves on, and it just felt so natural. From that moment I became so embedded in boxing. I found a friend in boxing."
"I had a drug problem. I'd go to parties, take a leak, and there was cocaine right there. I was 25 when it started, rich, famous, and retired."
"Duran quit in frustration. People were laughing and he couldn't deal with that."
"Inactivity is the biggest sin in boxing."
"The Ricky Hatton that beat Kostya Tszyu in 2005 can beat Floyd Mayweather, he was so focused and in such amazing physical shape that he would have given anybody at that level a tough time."
"That name, 'Manos de Piedra', is true, Hands of Stone. Every punch, and I'm not exaggerating, every punch that he hit me with, from the body to the head, felt like bricks, stone, rocks. He knocked my teeth back. My front, my first 3 or 4 teeth, he knocked them back because he was just so possessed. He was a demon."
"Of all the fighters today, I have to say that Mayweather reminds me most of me," Leonard told Irish boxing writer Brian Doogan in describing the incident. "The kid has every gift and physical attribute, but if he continues to be the kind of person he is, he'll never be one of us. He'll never make it."
"Andy Griffith His pursuit of excellence and the joy he took in creating served generations & shaped my life I'm forever grateful RIP Andy."
"His love of creating, the joy he took in it whether it was drama or comedy or his music, was inspiring to grow up around. The spirit he created on the set of The Andy Griffith Show was joyful and professional all at once. It was an amazing environment. And I think it was a reflection of the way he felt about having the opportunity to create something that people could enjoy. It was always with respect and passion for the opportunity and really what it could offer people in a very unpretentious and earthy way. He felt he was always working in service of an audience he really respected and cared about. He was a great influence on me. His passing is sad. But he lived a great rich life."
"The Vietnam War was raging at that particular time, so I wanted to do a positive play about a country character who was yearning for his home, as I was doing at Christmas…I drew on my experience growing up in the country - plowing mules, cropping tobacco, bootleggers, going to church. The rest was my imagination. I wanted to do something that could be performed on the streets - I love street theater. And I wanted my character to have a conscience."
"I am more interested in how the human being approaches the issue instead of trying to write about the issue itself because we really know what the issues are in this life regardless of what we’re talking about…"
"I would like to see a character make his stand on what he things [sic] about it because that way I think I can get into the humanness of people, and that’s really where my head is."
"A number of people go into this industry with the same dreams and hopes that everybody else has, but it just doesn’t happen for some people. A lot of times it’s not anything they did wrong. It just that the numbers are what they are and luck is what it is. So I feel extremely blessed and lucky every day that I’m able to make a living as an actor."
"I also think that in today’s industry, the financial repercussions of making a bad story have been mitigated by streaming services and cable fees, so that many movies are greenlit based on factors other than good story-telling. Connection to an audience is less important than impressing the decision-makers above you in the food chain, because they are the gatekeepers. Aligning with the popular messages or attitudes of the day have caused a lot of sloppy and obvious scripts to be funded and made, and that is why, IMHO, that the product coming out of Hollywood has been less popular — and mistrusted by a large part of the potential audience."